Gary Kivell Blog

From Brian Kivell

2009-06-23T08:02:00.000-04:00

Brian never wrote on the blog for the past year but he wrote this to his dad for Father’s Day and I wanted to share it. I hope he does not mind. J

You’re my brother you’re my sister

I remember my phone ringing March 17th, 7am. I had just walked into the Home Depot store in Sarnia 5 minutes before, ready to start work. Mom tried to hold her voice together when she told me where she was. “We think daddy has had a heart attack” I had already put my tools away and started for the car before mom told me not to leave work. Mom had gone with dad to the hospital in the middle of the night and not called anyone as she did not want to wake us. She had waited till 7am to call because she knew I would be up by then. I kept mom on the phone most of the drive as I sped toward the Chatham hospital, I had already past Wallaceburg before she realized I was driving. I arrived at the hospital at 8am and tried to make mom leave to get some sleep. Only after Sue, Syndie and Ben were called, and I promised to call with any and all information would she leave. Honestly, I do not remember who came first or second or when they arrived, how long anyone stayed for the first trip. I only remember each of them saying “I’m coming”. I tried as mom had with me-- to tell them not to come, and we would call with updates, but it is a fact that my family invented being stubborn and if they said they were coming-they were coming. Why did we all feel the need to be there? At that point we had no idea how incompetent the next 100 + professionals would be. What good would come of us all just sitting there? The simple fact is that there is strength in numbers. Dad needed mom, mom needed us and we needed each other. On the first trip to London for the “just to make sure we are right and its nothing to do with his heart angiogram” Ben and I were able to convince Sue and Syndie to stay at work and we would take care of mom. It was not supposed to be a huge deal anyway, but we promised news as soon as we had it. They both called my cell MORE THAN ONCE! (Hey, remember back then we were worried about getting in trouble for being on the phone in the hospital, LOL) Mom, Ben and I sat and waited. I remember waiting for the Dr to come so I could called my sisters and tell them they could be glad not to have made the trip all the way just to hear all was fine. After all, “this was not his heart”! Mom went in to see the Dr, while Ben and I waited. I was not prepared for the news we were given that day. I remember moms face when she came into the hall. She honestly had the same face that Grandpa Pearson had when he came to tell Ben and I about mom and dads “fender bender”. I don’t even know which sister I called, I just tried to tell the facts without crying. I do not remember the whole response I was given, only “I’m coming”. Over the next year there were so many trips to London . We all worried about mom so much as her whole life was displaced. As us 4 Kivell kids gave all we could, our families made great efforts and sacrifices for us to be there. Our families were Great! Our employers were great…. Well some were. NO NO NO MINE WAS NOT!!!! Ahhhh things are much better now. Mom and Dads friends (you know who you are) were amazing. My siblings and I had always been close before last year, but as our families came through this together we are closer now than when we used to drive from concert to concert in our sweet KFS van. Jim and Steve pulled A LOT of double duty at home while BJ and Sarah watched there babies turn to toddlers in the waiting rooms of the London hospital.

Good Mother

We watched and waited for the inevitable to happen. At some point mom would hit a wall and we needed to be there for her when she did. To my surprise, it never happened. In fact that is not true. There were many teetering moments when I was sure mom was done, nothing more to give. But just as the song says “His strength is perfect when our strength is gone. He’ll carry us when we can’t carry on. Raised in His power the week become strong. His strength is perfect” Every time mom hit a new wall, she knocked it down. It is clear to see that God gave mom the strength she needed. We remember when they took dad for the first surgery and mom basically collapsed on Ben and Syndie and we had to get her a wheelchair and a Dr to see her. It is good the doctor never did any work on her though; she might still be in recovery. Mom endured what not many people could have. Now after 50+10 yrs on earth her life is completely changed. She has learned to seize the day.

He knows what to do and He knows when

Although people that do not know what they are talking about still think dads fall off the stage at church started all of this, we know the two were not related. At the same time, I was telling dad he needed to go to the hospital to get his ribs checked the day before he went in with his chest pain. Maybe God did want him to go at first but as I said before, we are all stubborn. One of the things that we are all grateful for is that dad does not remember so much of what happened in that year. There is no sense in rehashing all the indignities dad suffered, from the countless days of waiting NPO and still having food brought, to being treated like a Guinea pig or worse a corpse.

Dad was so helpless through all of this. Even though it seems like he was at the mercy of the Dr’s, he was always in Gods hand. Lets be truthful, all of us at one point or another thought we would lose dad to this, but despite the best efforts of London to have a cool stat to brag about, dad is still here.

Dad told me that most of the time he was lucid in the hospital he was praying. I was worried at points that he did not care either way if he lived or died in there, and who could blame him. I am just so thankful the God give him the strength to hold on for his life once again. When I thought back about it, I remembered just how much dad prays. I remember going to his room after a bad dream and having him pray. If we were sick he would pray, when we drove somewhere he would prey, after a getting spanked- he would pray, at bedtime, meal time, practice time for patience, after practice time for forgiveness, and more. I remember countless times finding him on his knees in front of his chair with his bible in front of him crying and praying. Sometimes I would listen (is that rude?) more than anything else he prayed for his family. I am just so glad that I am not typing these things about someone who is not here to read it. It is also nice to know I can talk to him, and he is dad again.

I am done now. WOW, if I put this to music it could pass for one of Syndie’s songs

Happy 40th Anniversary

2009-06-21T21:47:00.003-04:00

Well beloved friends and family,

I told you I would keep the blog going until the end of June and here we are.

I was so overwhelmed and excited to see so many of you at our huge celebration party. That day will go UP in history for sure ---- as one of the most wonderful days of remembrance that we have shared in our lives.

2008 went DOWN in history with huge negative thoughts and feelings and emotions and 2009 is the year that has gone UP in history. We have sooooooo sooooooo much to be thankful for and YOU are one of the things that we thank the Lord for.

Thank you for your ongoing love and support. Last year we had so much wonderful support—emotional-physical-financial-spiritual and so many of you became such a blessing to our entire family. Now, we in turn are being allowed opportunities to bless other people the way that you blessed us. It sure is a nice to be on the giving end of things this year. God is so good.

We indeed are blessed as a family. All of our kids are doing well also. Brian is working and that is an answer to prayer as we know so many people are still without a job.

I have shared the following news personally with a lot of you and I have absolutely loved your reactions. A number of our friends were actually in joyful tears with us. A few of my co-workers at CCAC said that it made them shiver all over. Thank you for sharing our excitement. Yesterday at the party at church when I told some of you personally about our exciting news you expressed such joy. So for any that I did not get to share this news with personally---here is the story.

After going through the year from “the pit” last year and now to have had so many positive things happen this year---it so unbelievable. So for the BIG HUGE GREAT WONDERFUL AWESOME EXCITING THRILLING BEYOND BELIEF OVERWHELMING GRAND SPLENDID TREMENDOUS MARVELOUS INCREDIBLE FANTASTIC INCONCEIVABLE UNIMAGINABLE news read below.

Gary and Sherrill are going on a 6 night Cruise to celebrate the fact that they have been married for forty years and that Sherrill had a milestone birthday (50-10) and most of all that to celebrate the fact that Gary is alive and well and still living on planet earth. J J

You know how I like to make my stories long and detailed but I will keep this a little bit shorter. Suzie and Steve asked if we would mind if they joined us because they had always wanted to go on a cruise with their girls and the price we got the cruise for was called and “Early Booker” and was 80 percent off the list price. It was too good to be true.

A few days after the booking was complete Ben called to ask me for details and said-Mom—you are not going on the Freedom ship are you because that is the same ship that Sarah and I are booked on. Yup-you got that figured out!! Suzie had called Ben and they decided to be part of the celebration party. It was so great to think of spending a week with a couple of kids and their kids. We did talk a little too much about it in front of the other kids though. A couple of weeks after that we were at Brian and BJ’s and little five year old Gracie said grace. “Dear Jesus—thank you for making Papa all better and thank you that we can all go on the cruise together.”. I felt really sad and told BJ we would try not to talk it about it so much in front of the kids because poor little Gracie thought she was going to get to go on the cruise too. BJ’s eyes all filled up with tears and she said—“That is because she is going mom”. I literally dropped my place on the ground. They had received the call from Suzie and Ben and booked their tickets the same day. Now it just left Syndie and her family. They could not go because Jim is supposed to only take his vacation during the summer months. But how could the entire family be on a ship and not have the Best’s with us? It took a little bit of finagling but by the end of that week all of the rooms had been booked and the ENTIRE Gary Kivell family –the Lord willing-will sail away from Fort Lauderdale on November 1st. If you know our family well at all you know that there has been lots of hooting and hollering and yelling (and yes—even tears) and excitement as the news has been shared amongst the siblings that they were all going to be together on the ship. The whole works of us spent many many many long hours and days and nights in the Intensive Care Unit and crying on each other’s shoulders and now to think of being together to play and celebrate life and to enjoy the beautiful creation that God has given to us is just nothing short of a huge miracle for us.

Thank you for any part that you have played in our life story over the past year. Thank you for your love and your prayers and your time. Thank you for letting us know how much you care. Thank you for being you.

May God richly bless each and every one of you as we continue to travel this uncertain road of life. The time seems to go past so much faster than it used to and we want to seize every moment to make wonderful positive memories and to help others in need as we have been helped, to make their load a little lighter. Thanks for being part of our lives.

2009-06-09T14:45:00.001-04:00

My oh my--- the time just keeps going by so quickly. We are doing great and life is so good and we are so thankful to God for all of His blessings.

This past weekend I had my 50-10th birthday or I guess I could say my 30th birthday with 30 years of experience. Or was it the 10th anniversary of my fiftieth birthday. As you can see-I am having a little trouble saying the sixty word. I think my parents made a mistake when they told me the year I was born. J I am still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. J

We went away for a couple of days and everything just seemed so normal and natural. We talked a lot about the past year and how God had brought us through the darkness of that deep valley and now we are walking in the bright sunshine on the mountain tops.

This weekend is our 40th wedding anniversary and we plan to go to see our kids in Waterloo and we will stay at the Barnum motel. (thanks Kerry and Anna) Bend and Sarah are still getting settled into their new home and they no longer have a guest room. However—they live just a few blocks from the Barnum’s so it works well for us.

On the 20th we are have a big celebration party at the church and we would love to see any of you that are free to come and share a piece of cake with us. We are celebrating our Anniversary and my birthday but more than that we are celebrating the fact that God allowed Gary to stay and be a part of our lives. 40/60/ Gary’s alive. All of our kids will be home and we are looking forward to a fun day of celebrating.

Gary’s sister Sharon is coming to Chatham for a couple of weeks so that will be fun too.

So---check the blog one more time after the party and I will have our last BLOG update for you.

Thanks for your love—your support-your friendship-and your prayers.

God bless each and every one of you.

Sherrill

2009-05-25T20:31:00.000-04:00

OK---this one is just going to make you laugh. It is time we sent an email that was uplifting and happy and positive.

Yesterday afternoon Gary and I were sitting outside in the back yard and I told him I thought that very soon he would be able to go into the pool. His tummy wound is very tiny now and nearly healed over and the small one on his derrière is nearly gone as well.

He said—when do you think I can swim? Well—the pool is open and the temperature of the water is between 74-75 degrees.

I said—“um—maybe tomorrow” and he said—“what is wrong with today?” and with that he went and got his bathing suit on and you got it---------he went in for the first swim in two years. Of course I had to join him and it took my breath away since it was so cold ---but he did fine. Oh my goodness!!!!! Our pool is now partially a salt water pool because we both cried a lot because last year we wondered if Gary would ever be able to swim again. Isn’t that great??? We cried and then we laughed and we thanked the Lord over and over and over. Then today we went in again for a few minutes.

This summer is going to be the year to enjoy every single day and every single opportunity and every single event that happens.

Last Sunday night we bundled up in our warm jackets with hoods and gloves and went to see the fireworks in Dresden-in the convertible. It was very chilly but we had the heater blowing on high and we had fun. Gary said he does not want to miss one thing this year.

So----I am going to keep writing until the end of June and then we will close the blog and keep in touch by email.

Next weekend we are attending a wedding in London of our great niece. My oldest sister Ruth Ann’s oldest grandchild Kayla is getting married. Where does the time go???? We are looking forward to this special event too.

Love to you all

Sherrill

2009-05-20T05:49:00.002-04:00

Hello Blog Friends
I writing on behalf of my sisters and brother and we wanted to extend a very special invitation to you.
Last Fall we had hoped to have a little celebration party for all of our friends that had supported us through the days and weeks and months following dad's EIGHT surgeries. However--as you all know---dad ended up not getting better as soon as we had hoped and then surgery number nine took place and now it is over a year since this all started.
Now that we would like to have a little party to celebrate the fact that dad is alive, we also have within reach two more special occasions to celebrate.
So, on Saturday June 20th we are going to have a combined celebration for three special events.
1. dad surviving the past year
2. mom's 50 plus 10 birthday (she cannot say the word 60) June 06.
3. dad and mom's 40th wedding anniversary June 14th

So please mark it on your calendar and plan to drop in to have some dessert and coffee with our parents and the rest of our family.

We are hoping to see you all that afternoon.

See the invitation below.

2009-05-12T22:07:00.000-04:00

So much time has gone by since I wrote an update on the blog and we have so many more exciting things to share with you but I have been having computer troubles and have not been connected much. I think those issues are solved now (I hope and pray) so we will be able to be a little more regular with our updates in case you are still checking in with us. If you have written to me and not heard back please do not give up. I think everything is good again.

I want to keep the blog going until the first of July and then I probably will sign off and keep in touch with you by email.

Your support for our family over the past year has been amazing and we cannot thank you enough for the love and prayers and kind words and support in so many many awesome ways. Only God will be able to repay you since we could not begin to do that.

We have a couple extremely exciting things to share with you and I will do that very soon.

We are enjoying every single day and Gary continues to heal and we are so blessed to have his health returning to the point where if you met him on the street that you would find it hard to believe that one year ago TODAY the Doctors gave us very little hope of him surviving. He went to the OR one year ago tonight (on Ben’s birthday) and we all feared for his life BUT God had other plans. We are so thankful and we will continue to be eternally grateful.

Mother’s day was special this year especially because last year it was soooooooo horrific. Three of the kids were home for Friday and/or Saturday and we went to Syndie’s on Sunday after going to Suzie’s church. Then on Monday we went to Jasmin and Jade’s soccer games and that was another huge treat.

Last year Suzie missed soooooooo many of her kids soccer games because nearly every Sunday and Monday were the days she came to be with us in London. Now—to think that we were able to be there with her to see the kids play was super treat. It is amazing how the small things because such huge celebrations when they are looked at through the perspective of “a different set of eyes”.

God has blessed us more than I can tell you.

So---stay tuned and I will keep you posted on a couple more super celebrations that we are excited about.

God bless you friends.

Love

Sherrill

2009-04-28T05:45:00.000-04:00

As I said—things are so good here.

Gary continues to need the one wound on his chest/abdomen area packed. The first one has closed and now the second one is getting smaller every day.

I do the dressing except for a couple of times a week. The nurse wants to come all of the time but I can do it, so we are trying to save OHIP dollars. ;-)

To my utmost surprise I came home the other day from work and Gary was standing in the driveway beside the convertible. Brian had helped him get it unwrapped from the winter and then Gary took it out and got it all washed and ready for our first little outing. Wow---how much fun that was for us!!! We once again stopped in the driveway and prayed and thanked the Lord that we were back in our toy car and that Gary was driving and that we were together.

This past weekend we had the man come and uncover our above ground swimming pool. It is a little early for swimming but the fact of looking at the blue water is just so great. The big black cover is packed up now until the fall so we are thrilled about that. Last year we only opened the pool for such a short time so we asked the guy to please put us at the beginning of his list this year.

I think I might have mentioned that Gary was having some trouble with his hip. We think it might have been from all of the time he spent in bed last year, but whatever the cause was, he agreed to go to the massage therapist to see if she could help him. That has worked well and he has very little discomfort with that now.

Saturday we headed out in the “toy” and went to Sarnia. The sky started to look dark so we headed home and thankfully we stayed ahead of the wild hail and wind and rain storm that hit that area.

So for our big news Gary and I had planned a couple of years ago that in January 2009, we would probably plan to go on a cruise to celebrate a couple of special events in our lives. However---as you all know—THAT did not happen. This June, I am turning “50-10” (I just am having a little trouble saying the word 60) and also in June Gary and I will be married for 40 years and since Gary is alive and doing so well we have decided to celebrate all of our blessings by planning a cruise for the first part of November 2009. I told Gary that I wanted him to be able to help with the luggage before we booked a trip and if he continues to improve the way that he has been doing the last couple of months, then he will be able to handle it all alone. I have already got my time off from work approved and the cruise is booked and we will just have to book flights as it gets closer to the date of the trip. We are both so excited about the trip but we have decided we must put it on the back burner for now so that we can enjoy every single day of the Spring and Summer and Fall and not wish one day away that the Lord has given to us to enjoy.

With the pool being open in our yard this summer, I imagine that we will spend a lot of time gathered around there. Our grand kids all love the water and we love having the kids and grand kids home to enjoy it with us.

Our bad horrible awful year is behind us and all things bright and beautiful are ahead for us. As we watch the leaves bursting forth on the trees and we are seeing the flowers all starting to bloom we are just thanking God over and over and over that we are able to be here tougher to enjoy all of these wonderful creations.

Thank you for sharing our journey. This trip is one we were not have made it through without your love and prayers and support.

Tonight when Gary came outside carrying a tray with some of our supper on it—I just stood and praised the Lord for His faithfulness to us. It would seem like a small thing to most people but to us---it is just one huge miracle.

Until the next update in a week or so—know we love you all.

Sherrill

2009-04-27T04:08:00.001-04:00

It was 17 years ago today that my precious dad went to be with his best friend Jesus. Wow—the time just marches past so fast and we are all getting one day closer to going to Heaven.

My wonderful husband is doing great and I will write a longer note tomorrow to fill you in on the last week.

However---I have had computer issues but I wanted to say hello and let you know that things are wonderful and I will write a longer note within a couple of days.

Thanks for loving us.

If you are reading this please put a little check mark on your calendar for June 20th. More details to follow.

Love

Sherrill

2009-04-15T22:43:00.000-04:00

Hi there friends,
I am sorry it has taken me so long to get this latest update to you. It seems that since Gary is very anxious to do things every single time I am not working so I do not have time to spend playing on the computer. So--I will give you a fast update.

Easter weekend was very nice and Gary went to the music presentation at our church each night and was so glad to be there with the people he usually sings with. The directors had taken video shots of a number of our church people that had a testimony to praise the Lord about and so Gary was one of the people that they chose. How does a person put into three or four minutes what the Lord has done for the past year? However---it was a nice thing for him to be involved in. On Saturday we drove the back roads to Windsor and had a beautiful turkey dinner with Suzie and Steve and the girls. Then on Sunday we went to Brian and BJ's for a lovely dinner of lasagna and salad. On Sunday night after church we went to Boston pizza with the choir from church. On Monday we got up and headed across the boarder at Walpole Island and went to Chesterfield area and did a little bit of shopping and ate a Chinese buffet. I have done well with my weight loss so far but if I keep eating like this past week end it will not be good for me and I will have to get some different clothes again. :(
On Tuesday Gary was back in the out patient department at the hospital having another lump cut open and drained. The Dr. saw him last Monday because he had developed a second lemon sized lump and he put him on antibiotics for a week and that did not help. So on Tuesday he removed a small chunk of his flesh and drained this mass and now it has about 30 - 35 inches of packing in it. The other lump has healed to where we only pack it with 4 -5 inches of packing. The wound on his bottom had closed but this weekend I think Gary just sat too much becasue he was feeling really good and it was NOT good for his wound on his bottom. It has opened up a little bit and that was not good news but we will get it closed back up again..
He never complains about any of this and if you were to see him you would not even realize that he still has to have the nurse come every day and do these dressing changes. He says from what he has come through this past year that this is just a little tiny bump in the road and not worth talking about. hmmmmmm------I guess the Dr. feels a little different than Gary does.
Today on my way home from work Brian called and invited us over for shishkabobs for supper. We went there and Gary sat outside with Brian and BJ for an hour and I took the three little girls for a long walk. The sunshine was such a blessing.
This weekend we are keeping Suzie and Steve's girls overnight because they have a meeting they need to attend out of town. It is always so great to have the grandkids come to visit.
Syndie and Jim are away with their kids in Atlanta Georgia and so I am not sure if this note will get posted for a day or so. However-----I just appreciate the fact that Jim still takes care of this for us.
So-----we still need your prayers and we appreciate your love.
If I were to give you a report from Gary he would tell you that he is doing great and he smiles so much and many time a day he just says that he is so glad to be alive.
I am so glad that he is alive too and I am so glad that he is feeling so much like going places and doing things. We are looking forward to an awesome Spring---if it would ever get here and stay for more than just an hour or so. They are saying we are going to have a lovely weekend and then we might get snow again next week. However--we KNOW that sooner or later we will be complaining about how hot it is outside. BRING IT ON!!!
Love you all
Sherrill

2009-04-06T22:31:00.002-04:00

What a wonderful weekend we had. We left as soon as I was done work on Thursday at 3.30 pm and Gary picked me up at work and we headed to the boarder again and to Jim and Syndie's for supper. We spent the evening visiting and got to bed early. On Friday we got up and had breakfast and then went and did a little shopping. We spent a pleasant day and then had supper with Syndie and the family. Syndie and Sami and I decided to walk to the school to see the play and the guys were going to bring the van. I cannot tell you how windy and cold it was walking the few blocks to the school. Oh my goodness. My faced pained for nearly an hour after we got there. The play was really cute and Emily did a great job. Jim has already posted a photo of Em after the play giving her Papa a hug. It is so great to be able to be a part of the kid’s lives again. It was a long year where we missed out on so much of their lives and the things that involved them. We had just arrived at the school when Jim called Syndie and told her that they had just lost the power at the house. So when we got home after the play it was getting pretty cold in the house and we had no power until the middle of the night when some lights came on when we were sound asleep. But it was fun sitting around before we went to bed and having a visit by candle light.

On Saturday Jim and Syndie had a conference to attend so we stayed with the kids until 2 pm. We had a very uneventful trip home and then had Sunday to get re-grouped before I had to go back to work today. I had a note nearly half written on my lap top when I kept losing it and the computer kept shutting down. I called the Dell help line and some lady had me on the phone for over an hour---till after 11.30 pm. She had me removing 8 screws from the back of the laptop and taking out the battery and two “chips” and all kinds of things that I never ever would have believed I could do. She had me put them in and take them out and put the battery in and out and drain the power and oh my goodness. I asked her if I was a qualified technician now??? After all of her over-the-phone diagnostic stuff she told me to pack up the laptop and send it back to them so that is why I never go this note finished. I jut got that done now.

This morning I was up early to get another week of Gary’s medication poured and then to go to the dentist for a cleaning and check-up and then after work at 4.00 pm I had an eye examination—my first one since 2005. I guess it was about time.

On the weekend Gary developed another lemon sized lump on his chest/tummy. So this morning he was at the outpatient department seeing the surgeon again. I called Dr. Mahoney’s office at 9 am and they said to send him right to the hospital. So—he went all by himself and I felt really bad about that but he managed OK. Except when he went out to add more money to the meter, he put the money in the wrong meter so someone else got free parking, compliments of Gary. The Dr. tried to drain this lump by puncturing a hole from the inside of the lump that is already healing and trying to join the two lumps on the inside with a puncture wound but it did not work. So he put him on antibiotics and I guess we will just wait and see what happens in the next couple of days. He said he did not want to do another incision because it is more risk for infection.

He got home safe even with this horrid rotten snowy winter weather and was on the couch resting when he got a call from the therapist he seeing for his sore hip and she was asking him if he was not coming for his treatment at 2.00pm and he had forgotten to go. Whoops.

Did I get a chance to tell you that the hospital bed was picked up on Thursday and returned to where it came from and we now have our couch back in the room and it looks so nice again. Little by little our hospital looking house is returning to a home. The walker and the bed and the commode chair and canes and so many things that have been here are now part of the past, Thank you Lord.

This weekend we will celebrate Easter and that will be special. Last year Gary was in the Chatham hospital instead of on the stage for the Easter play. Brian did such a great job of filling in for him last year and this year Brian is in the presentation again so that is awesome.

Brian started a new job today so we thanking God for that and we trust it works out well for their family.

OK—bedtime. Sorry for the delay in the update.

Love to all

Sherrill

2009-04-04T20:21:00.000-04:00

2009-04-02T04:32:00.001-04:00

It is now Tuesday and tomorrow we are entering the month of April—new beginnings-fresh starts-Spring is coming.

This weekend we are heading to Syndie’s again – this time for Emily’s play at her school. Emily is in Grade 8 and this is the last school play that she will have in Public School. We are going to go on Thursday when I am done work and likely stay until sometime on Saturday.

Gary continues to just be so anxious to do things and he goes for walks by himself now when I am work and he has also driven to two appointments all by himself. I get a little anxious but he is doing so well.

When I get home from work we usually go for a little walk and then either before supper or after supper we go and walk through a store. Yesterday we actually went downtown to the mall and that is the first time in over a year that we have done that.

We are both just so happy with life right now. We have so much to be thankful for and following an experience like we have gone through it makes us so grateful for all of the small things. Gary has never liked to sit in the direct sun light but the other day when the sun was shining right on him he said it was absolutely wonderful compared to being in a hospital room. I guess all of life takes on a new perspective when we look at things from all angles.

We are looking forward to opening the pool and we trust that Gary’s wounds will be healed up and that he will be able to spend some time in the water with the family. It will be great to have him even sitting on the deck if he cannot swim as much as the rest of us. This year he will be able to go up onto the deck by himself instead of needing the help of his two sons.

We are still having the nurse come a few times a week and I do the dressing the rest of the time. Tonight when I did his dressing I can feel another large lump that wants to surface so we will have to keep an eye on it and see what happends. At least we know that we do not have to go into panic mode if it happens again. We will just have to keep treating the wounds if they appear again. We can hope that it does not happen--- but if it does we will deal with it.

I will write again on the weekend at some point.

Love to all.

Sherrill

PS: We have mentioned that Brian has been without a job since last July and thank the Lord he is now starting a new position on Monday. Thank the Lord for that. With so many people being unemployed it is very difficult to find a job but the Lord is faithful.

2009-03-29T19:59:00.006-04:00

It is true----it was one year ago today that my beloved husband went to the Operating Room to have his Open Heart Surgery.

We were talking about it this afternoon and I reminded him about the fact that I had taken a little episode of going into shock right after we had left him at the OR door and I began shaking for three hours and kept our poor kids in a turmoil, trying to make sure that their mother was not going to have a heart attack or stroke while their dad was in the OR. I always tried to brush it off and told them I just faked that spell to keep their minds occupied so they did not worry about their dad. As I started to reminisce about things about March 29th 2008 with Gary today, he surprised me by telling me he had absolutely no recollection of being told anything about this story and he had no idea that I had gone through that experience. That episode of "shock" was the first time that I had ever had anything like that happen to me. I hope it was the last time. The reason it came up today was because I was so cold and I just felt I could not get warm and it reminded me of a year ago today when when I was shaking so terribly. The kids covered me with their coats and with their babies blankets and other blankets from the patient's laundry cart. That day I seemed to be shaking from inside out. Craziness for sure.

Anyway----now as we go forward into this year and into the Spring Season and then into the Summer we will celebrate every single thing that we can and enjoy every moment that we can be outdoors. We are looking forward to making up on all of the things that we lost out on in each one of our grandkids lives. It is so thrilling for me that Gary has the energy to have already started doing that.
Yesterday the entire family was home and the weather was so nice that we sat outside for a couple of hours and the kids had a wonderful time riding bikes and going to the school yard to play. It is so great now that the five oldest grandkids can take responsibility for the four youngest little ones and that gives all of the mom's a break. JJ had a good time playing with his BOY cousin Jack. They had fun playing hockey in the driveway. That relationship will continue to enhance as Jack gets older and JJ can be his mentor.

Erica had a little accident when her foot got caught in the spokes of my bike and wrecked her shoe and sock and hurt her ankle but other than that the entire day was a total success. I guess that one cousin was riding double with her and that is when the accident took place. :) :) I have not checked the bike for damages yet. :)
We had a great supper together and then sat and visited until it was time for everyone to head back home. Two grandkids got to stay for the remainder of the weekend and so we still have Erica and Jasmin here with us. After church this morning we took them out for lunch and then shopping to Wal-Mart to get some new shoes. The girls have spent the remainder of the afternoon scrap booking. Like mothers-like daughters.

So we are enjoying each other and enjoying every blessing that God continues to give to us.

2009-03-25T12:53:00.001-04:00

The report from today with the surgeon was extremely positive. He told Gary that he is totally amazed at how the wound on his bottom has healed. Of course everyone is still amazed that his chest wound closed so miraculously without a skin graft. I guess the CT scan revealed that there are another couple (at least) areas that could react the same way that this past lump has done. The doctor said to just watch and if one appears again the way this last one did that the same procedure will be followed that was followed this time. That means that the mass would be lanced and then drained and then packed and we will just hope that no more appear. This wound is 8 cm in depth and is healing well.

Gary was pretty excited today because this was the very first time since last March 17th that he has driven the van alone to go to an appointment. Brian met him at the hospital but Gary went on his own and parked in the lot and all of these first time things are so impressive. It is a little hard for me to let go—--well maybe I should be honest and say it is very hard to let him do things alone again. I have been like his total protector and total caregiver and I have felt like the mother of a small child for a year now and so I have to let go and allow him do more and more things on his own so that he can get his life back to normal. After he was done at the hospital he came and met me for lunch. ((He even remembered to bring his medication with him from home)). Now to most people to have their husband meet them for lunch would not be a big deal -- but for us----it was another celebration time. All of these FIRSTS are monumental for us. We are loving it.

I planned on sending this yesterday but when I got home from work I went to babysit for Brian and BJ because poor little five year old Gracie got her hand slammed in the hinge side of the bathroom door and had to go to Emergency. The force of the closed hinge side of the door on her little thumb actually popped the flesh and caused her nail to come loose. She has her little hand all bandaged up for a few days. Brian had rehearsal for the Easter play and so BJ was at the hospital and I was with the other three.

This weekend the kids all coming to our house. This was supposed to be our weekend away at the Greenfield Inn to celebrate lots of things but since Gary is not able to swim YET we decided there was no use paying to stay at a motel with a pool and hot tub and for Gary to just have to sit and watch. So it was a unanimous decision to just have everyone home to spend time together.

Ben and Sarah moved into their new place last week and they are bringing home some things they do not have space for in their new place so we might have to have an auction among the family members to see who will store what things for them. Ha-ha

We are storing their queen size sleigh end bed, so we just donated the bunks beds that were in that room to a charity. Now Brian has to move the double bed to the other smaller room where the bunk beds were so that the queen size bed will go into Ben’s old room which is a little bigger. I said to someone that Ben’s move is causing us a lot of work. I guess it is an opportunity to do some cleaning.

Love to all and I will stay in touch.

2009-03-24T04:15:00.002-04:00

Hi friends
We had a delightful birthday weekend for Gary and went away to the states to go to granddaughter number 4----Samantha Best’s play at her school on Thursday evening. Gary drove for the very first time by himself on Thursday and came to my office to get me and we left at 2.15 pm from work and had a great trip across the bridge at Detroit and we arrived at Syndie’s in time for a little supper and then headed to the school for the play. Gary drove the entire way to Syndie's. When we got to the school, the seats were theater seats so they were great for Gary with his own cushion for a little extra comfort. Sami did a super job and was really the star of the show as she played the role of Glinda in The Wizard of Oz. She is her mother's daughter and is a real performer. She just is a natural on the stage.

We had decided to have Gary’s birthday celebration on Friday since the play on was Thursday. On Friday we slept in a little bit and then got up and went to a couple of stores and then went out for lunch and if we said it once we said it twenty times that we were sooooooooooo glad to be feeling like we were back to some semblance of normalcy. On Friday at supper time Suzie arrived with her two girls and we had a wonderful supper together for their dad's birthday. Jim and Steve had gown to a conference in Toronto so it was kinds fun to just have the two girls and five grandkids together.
We stayed up late and chatted and Suzie left just before midnight but left her girls at Syndie's to spend the night with their cousins and then we took them back home on Saturday.

Saturday morning was the day of decorating. Easter Eggs with the grandkids. That was fun and messy but the kids enjoyed themselves. We went to Trader Joe's with Syndie on Saturday after lunch and then got packed up and headed back to Windsor with Jasmin and Jade. We stayed and had supper with Suzie and then headed home and got to bed early. Sunday we were up early for church and then spent a quiet afternoon before the week started again on Monday.
I had to do Gary's packing for both of his wounds on the weekend and it went OK. Everything is continuing to heal so well. His chest is good and his bottom is nearly healed and this new area is still needing a number of inches of packing but seems to be ok. Tomorrow Gary goes to the hospital again to see Dr. Mahoney and will find out the results from the cat scan that he had on the 17th. I will keep you posted tomorrow night with the results. The most wonderful news that I could give you would be to say that we are going to be ending the blog because Gary was given a clear bill of health. The day that I can type that will be a day for celebration. Hang on--it might be sooner than you think. :)
Love
Sherrill

2009-03-18T05:07:00.000-04:00

Today was the day for Gary's cat scan. It worked out that he got a ride to the hospital with his nurse. I think that is considered pretty good treatment – don’t you??

I had it all arranged in my mind that our son Brian would take Gary and then found out it was March break and he was taking his family away for the day. Then I had his sister Linda all arranged to take him and that plan fell apart this morning just before it was time for him to have to go. That was when the nurse arrived so it worked out great.

I was going to take off to take him but he would rather I take time away from work to spend with him doing something other than hanging around a hospital corridor and waiting room. It is ironic that we walked those halls exactly one year ago today. It almost gave me a panic attack to walk into that place however I just chose to say over and over—Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus. I am so grateful for where we are now.

Tomorrow Gary was supposed to be going to see Dr. Leigh to see what the cat scan showed today but now they want him to wait till next week and then we go from there. I hope it just shows a nice happy healthy smile under that huge scar of this wonderful miracle man and not any issues. He sees the surgeon again next Tuesday.

We are still planning on going to Syndie and Jim’s place this weekend if all is well. I am taking Friday off from work and that will give us a nice long weekend. Then Emily---who will be going into HIGH SCHOOL in the fall will be having her last public school play the first part of April and will plan to attend that as well if all goes well. We will go to Suzie and Steve's on our way home.

I shared with someone this week that after being with Ben and Sarah and little Jack that we feel as if we have lost an entire year of our grand children’s lives. Yes---we have neglected our own kids because they have been the ones on the giving side of life and have had to take care of their parents. But with the little ones—it has just hit us hard that this past year has been lost and we have a whole lot year of catching up to do with grand kids. I have not even ONCE changed Katie or Jack’s diapers. For so many months we lived in London and then when we came home all of our energy was devoted to surviving. Then when I went back to work in October and still had the responsibility of Gary being so ill again and then having more surgery again and then dealing with the death of his dad–I just tried to keep coping and taking care of him and I had nothing much to give to anyone else and that was unfortunate. a Gracie keeps asking when she can come and spend the night at Gramma and Papa’s and that was promised a LONG time ago. We have always tried –prior to this past year-- to attend some of the kids sports activities and school functions but we have missed out on all of that stuff. That is why we are so anxious to swing back into our active lifestyle.

Spring is just around the corner and the grass is starting to turn green and the flowers and the trees will begin to show that they have survived the winter. We are just going to rejoice that we will be part of all this year. How well I remember the beautiful ice and snow covered trees in Spring Bank Park that we saw last year while Suzie and Syndie and I drove to the London hospital on the day of Gary’s surgery. Wow----this Spring is just going to be awesome.

We are getting anxious to unwrap the blue plastic from the “toy”. We saw a guy in a convertible yesterday and we both had to stay calm and not go rushing home to take the cover off of ours.

After an experience like the one we have gone through this year, it puts absolutely everything into a brand new perspective and every little pleasure in life becomes special.

The time goes past so quickly and we want to soak in every single minute of life as it is given to us.

2009-03-17T04:07:00.000-04:00

One year ago today---March 16th--I went to bed and Gary woke me up at 3.00 am with terrible chest pain and I called the ambulance and ONE entire year later we are beginning to get our life back again. My oh my oh my!!!! In some ways it is hard to put into words what we are feeling right now.
God has sure been with us and we are so thankful for the way he has brought us to this point.

Gary's bottom wound is just a tiny spot now and his chest is closed completely. This silly lump that developed on his abdomen has caused us a little stress and then yesterday he developed another lump. He goes tomorrow at 11.30 am to have his cat scan and then he goes to see Dr. Leigh on Wednesday to get the results from that. It is rather weird to think that a year after the fact that the place where chest tube drains were, might still be causing a problem. However-------it is rather minor compared to the huge issues we have faced this past year. Gary has no pain in the area and so that is good. When the nurse was packing in 36 inches of gauze he said that he did not like that. I was going to do the dressing but I decided that I did not want to do that. I have done a lot of the dressing changes but I did not like the packing idea.

We had a delightful weekend and went to see little Jack on his 2nd birthday. He had a party at his Oma and Papa Stubbe's place with all of the their family and it was so neat to be able to be there. Gary did really well on the trip to Waterloo and we stayed at our friends Anna and Kerry Barnums. They are always such wonderful hosts to us and we were so thrilled to be able to be there with them again----the first time since October of 2007.

Ben and Sarah were very busy with lots of friends painting their newly acquired house. It was so nice to be able to see it empty and then we will look forward to seeing it once they get moved into it.
We went out for a wonderful treat of Chinese Food for supper Saturday night and that was great.

Sunday morning we went to church where Sarah leads the Worship. That was great too.
We had an uneventful trip home on a beautiful sunny afternoon. Gary's bottom was very tired from from the amount of sitting that he did on the weekend. When we got home he went directly to his bed and even ate his supper while he laid down.
So, tomorrow he will have the cat scan and I will feel better after we get those results.

On Thursday-the Lord willing we will be going to Syndie and Jim's to see Sami's school play. Thursday is Gary's 62nd birthday and we are so looking forward to that as well. Last year he was in ICU on his birthday and I had to go the hospital before work to tell him that his dad had just been diagnosed with brain cancer. So-----every single thing that will take place this year is going to be such a celebration. It is strange how much we can take for granted when things are going along smoothly but we feel like we have been given a second chance to enjoy every little detail of life as it comes to us.

I will write again on Wednesday after we see Dr. Leigh.

Love
Sherrill

2009-03-12T04:28:00.000-04:00

Hi friends,

Well my dear husband does not want things just to be simple for us-- so this little mass that he developed on his abdomen has decided to create a little more stress for all of us. He had the Ultra Sound and then they decided that the results were inconclusive and they threw out some possibilities about what this lemon sized lump might be and then they booked him for an CT scan on March 17th.

Well, last Friday this mass changed and caused me some big concerns and I called the family Dr. and he was away until Monday and so I called the wound specialist and she was away until Monday and then I called the surgeon’s office and he was away until Tuesday so I did what I felt best over the weekend and then I took him to the family Doctor on Monday. The Dr. used a scalpel and made an incision under the mass and it starting DRAINING big time. He did a culture and said for me to take him to the surgeon on Tuesday. So Brian took him to the out-patients dept to see Dr. Mahoney and after much poking and prodding he now has 36 inches of gauze packing ((that has been soaked in a solution of normal saline with a small amount of bleach solution added to it)) being stuffed into this area. The poor guy just never seems to have anything easy. The Dr. said he is not sure why this developed and it could be from the insertion last year of one of the chest tube drainages or who really knows for sure at this point. The good thing is that he has not had any fever or any redness or other signs or symptoms of a serious infection. The culture results will likely be back tomorrow or Friday and then that will tell us a little more of a what we are facing. The nurse is coming daily again now to do these dressing changes. I will do the packing on the weekend.

Now---I have saved the best part of the story until the last--and do we have news to share. GARY'S CHEST WOUND IS COMPLETELY CLOSED. Yes--that massive huge cavity in his chest has now sealed completely over. London said he would need to come back for skin grafts because apparently they say that skin can only grow a certain number of centimeters and then it just stops and Gary's wound was so huge they said it would never close BUT it has closed. On the last inch we used Raleigh's Salve and it worked wonders. I told Gary I am going to start using that on his bottom wound as well. I called the plastic surgeon's office on Tuesday and told him that it was 11 months exactly to the day since they had re-opened Gary's chest after his bi-pass surgery and now the entire area was completely healed. Thank the Lord. I thanked the plastic surgeon for all of his help and care but told him we would not need to book an appointment for any further surgery with him. Jesus did our healing. :) :)

So now we are just going to trust that we can get his bottom healed up and then this new area on his abdomen needs to be healed up and then we will be home free. What a day that will be.

In the meantime, Gary's spirits are good and his walking is good and he is happy and relatively healthy. He had a little fall yesterday when he tripped over a footstool but he did not hurt himself.

Ben's little guy Jack is going to be two on Friday the 13th. We want to go and see him so badly so if everything goes well, we are hoping to make the big trip to Waterloo and stay with our friends the Barnums overnight and then see Ben and Sarah's new house as well on Saturday. They get the keys to their house tomorrow. We hope it all works out that we can do that.

We will keep you posted. Tomorrow -----Thursday---it will be one year since Gary fell at church and broke his rib.. Wow!!!!!!!!

2009-03-06T21:51:00.000-05:00

Friday evening March 06 2009.
It has been a busy week for me at work and I am so glad that the weekend is here. I had a special big project that I was working on and it is nice to have it behind me for sure. I work at a great place and every one is so helpful and so supportive of each other and that makes a huge difference in a day of work. I have never worked at a better place-with the nicest people anywhere around.
Gary was thrilled today with the nice weather. As you all know--we missed the entire season of Spring and most of the Summer last year and therefore we are soooooooooooooo excited about the prospect of the nice weather coming soon. I told Gary today that it was so hard on me to be on the 6th floor of that hospital for weeks and weeks and then months and months while the weather looked so wonderful through the window. I am such an outdoors person and to be inside a hospital for all of those beautiful days was very hard for me. Gary was so sick and he did not realize much of anything for the majority of time that he spent in the hospital. He said at times he tried to block out life and the rest of the time the medication blocked him from reality.
The weather today was above 65 and I came home at lunch and we went for a short walk and then as soon as I got home after work this afternoon we went for another walk and breathed in the warm air and soaked up the warm sunshine. Then I got Gary a lawn chair and he sat in the driveway where the sun was shining and he enjoyed a few more wonderful warm rays. While we were outside we called and wished my dear friend Pat H. a happy birthday. Gary even sang with me and that was good. He has not tried to really "sing" yet. He is still nervous that he will not be able to sing but I really feel that he will be OK. We have a new friend-a Doctor from London and she believes that he will be able to sing just fine. I know that he might have to build back up to it slowly but his throat is not raspy any longer when he speaks so that is a good sign. He has been nervous ever since he pulled out the ventilation tube while the bulb was still inflated when he was in Intensive Care. They told him he could have ruined his vocal chords and he has been afraid to test it. But I am sure he will get the courage to do that soon.
We are little bit anxious about this silly mass on his stomach but we will just trust it is ok and wait for the test on the 17th and then the appointment to get the results from that.
Tomorrow we have no plans except to enjoy the day and then we are invited to a birthday supper for a friend of ours. Last Saturday we went out for supper with friends to celebrate Sue C.'s birthday--the day before her husband John left for three weeks in Africa. So we are staying busy and starting to feel almost a little normal again.
If everything continues to improve the way that it is now, we hope to go to Waterloo next weekend to see Ben and Sarah's new house and celebrate Jack's second birthday. We will stay with our friends Anna and Kerry B and it will seem like the olden days are back. March the 12th will be the 1st year anniversary of this journey and that will be the day before we head off to start this year with life the way it used to be. We have been on the sidelines of so many things for so long and we are just so thrilled to be making plans to do things like other people are doing.
Yes yes yes-------God is good. Life is not always fair---------but God is always good.

2009-02-28T09:17:00.000-05:00

Hi all,

Gary will have his Cat Scan on March 17th. That might not mean much to all of you BUT that is exactly ONE year from the day that I called the ambulance for Gary and he went into the hospital for this bad awful horrible terrible unbelievable life-threatening , unforgettable, dreadful year. It is just nothing short of a miracle that Gary survived this year and we know that HE has a plan for him now that he is getting back to normal more every single day.

We were reviewing some photos today of when Gary was his very sickest and it once again swept over the both of us how marvelous it is that he is still here. Sometimes we need to be reminded of how much God has done for us and how much He has been in control of all of our situations even when we felt we had lost control. So many times in the past year we felt that Gary could have left us but I thank God every single day that He chose to leave him here with us. I firmly believe that he will be able to sing again and that he will have a testimony to share with people that God is still on the throne and still is the performer of miracles today. Sometimes it is easy to ask WHY????? Sometimes it is hard to come up with the answer to that huge question when we think of the suffering and the pain and the year that we feel we have lost. But only God knows why He allowed it to take place and why He allowed Gary to live when so many times the Doctors thought he was a goner. I hope we never lose sight of the fact of how He brought us through and I hope we will always have the same excitement of enjoying each day together that He blesses us with now..

I will let you know about the Cat Scan when we get the results from that--probably about March 24th.

I will post another update in a week or so and let you know how things are then.
Love

Sherrill

2009-02-24T22:20:00.000-05:00

It is now February 24th and Gary went to the Dr. today. The doctor had ordered an ultra sound because he has a lump or mass of some kind high in his abdomen. The surgeon wonders if ---since his sternum is no longer in his chest -- that other things may have shifted or if he might have a hernia or if his ziphoid has shifted and has become covered with calcium. The ultra sound was inconclusive and therefore the Dr. has now ordered a cat scan. They are supposed to call tomorrow to tell us when that will be booked.
Otherwise he is still doing amazing. Every day he gets stronger and is feeling more like and acting more like the Gary we all used to know. His eyes are clearer and his walking is still improving and everything is good.
I will keep you posted little updates as they come.

Love
Sherrill

2009-02-22T03:58:00.002-05:00

We have had a great week. Gary went to the surgeon on Tuesday and he was still very happy with his wounds. He told him extremely firmly that he cannot go swimming for quite a while yet and so we have postponed our planned little weekend get-a-way with our kids that we had planned for the end of March. We had thought we would have a little "end of winter" and "end of our horrible year" celebration. We were going to go to the Greenfield Inn where they have a beautiful Indoor Pool and Swimming Spa/Hot tub and stuff like that---but we have all decided that since Gary cannot go in the water that we will just not go there and instead we will have a family time here at our house. Little Jack (Ben and Sarah's son) will be turning two on March 13th and Gary's birthday (that he never celebrated while he was in the hospital last year) is March 19th so we will have a time together and celebrate those two events. It was on his birthday last year that I had to tell him that his dad had just got the test results back and he had been diagnosed with brain tumors. As you know his dad died on Oct 1st.
The Dr. on Tuesday ordered an ultra sound for Gary (he had it on Wednesday) since he wonders what is going on in his chest area since he has no sternum now. We will get the results of that this Tuesday.
This week has been so great and Gary has done so well since he has come off those horrid sleeping pills. It is like the difference between night and day with how he is walking and how he is thinking and how he is feeling. He is sleeping better as well without the medication. He hardly staggers at all now and that has made such a difference to his walking. He called me at work on Friday to tell me that his friend John C was picking him up and they were going out for lunch together. That is another "first" since last year. We are going to continue to celebrate "all" of these "firsts" that might not seem very special to everyone else but when life comes to an abrupt halt and then starts to return with baby steps -we will celebrate each and every one and thank the Lord for each one as well.
We went out for breakfast this morning with Gary's brother and his wife and then we had another FIRST time in a year experience. As hard to believe as it might seem, Gary went to 43 Pembroke Street--the home of his parents --for the first time since last March. It was quite a strange feeling for him because the last time he was there his dad made him his breakfast. Now his dad has been gone to heaven for nearly five months and this was the first time Gary has felt well enough to face going to their house. Each time will be easier I am sure.
Today it decided to snow again and while I was outside shoveling, I was also BBQing supper---pretending that spring is coming soon.
I will keep updating the blog every week or so until we can have our final hooray that life has returned to a semblance of normal and that there is nothing more to tell. Please pray that it will be very soon.
I cannot emphasize enough how much things have improved and how much better Gary is doing in the last two weeks. We just need to get the wounds to be completely closed and then we will plan our celebration party. :) The one end of the wound on his bottom is still an inch deep and the other end is only 1/2 inch deep and it is closed between the two areas. And his chest is still about the size of an almond but it is just a surface wound now, with no depth to it at all--it just looks like a scrape with no skin on it.
Tomorrow is Sunday and we will plan to go to church for at least half of it. Gary throughly enjoys the worship and then we still tape the Crystal Cathedral and watch it during the afternoon. Sitting is still the hardest thing for him to do and our church pews -even with a cushion- are too hard to handle after an hour.
Take care and know you are special to us.

2009-02-15T20:11:00.000-05:00

Imagine the fact that the only place Gary has been for months is in a hospital setting or in our family room and now this weekend we spent in a bed and breakfast on beautiful FROZEN Lake Huron. Brian and BJ gave us their gift that they won on the radio and it was a wonderful place for us to just have a total change of pace from what we have been experiencing for the past year. We kept commenting on how THIS IS WHAT LIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE. And we know we are moving back towards the days when we can live as a normal couple again---without nurses having to dress wounds and personal support workers helping with the activities of daily living. It has been like a breath of fresh air to be part of the REAL world and to share a weekend at the place with a pool and hot tub that I got to enjoy and Gary enjoyed watching me enjoy it. :) Does that make any sense??
The bed and breakfast is huge place and has ten guest rooms and the pool and hot tub and sauna and a beautiful dining room overlooking the water where we had six delicious meals. We had lots of time to just enjoy the beauty that God has created for us and feel renewed and ready to keep pressing on together to face any more difficult times that come our way. We know Spring is just around the corner and that is so exciting for us since we never knew it even came last year. And then we will look forward to the summer and all of the excitement that it will bring with family get-to-gathers and picnics and long drives in the convertible. So--we are thrilled with how Gary handled the trip here and the little activities that we were able to share here.
Two weeks ago I suggested to Gary that he either had to go to the Doctor and get his prescription renewed for his sleeping medication or that he could start to wean off taking them. His decision was to not take any more--starting that night. Well friends--what a wonderful decision that turned out to be. He is sleeping better than he has for the past year and he is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much steadier on his feet during the day and his walking has improved 100 percent. He know longer staggers like the drunken sailor when we walk and he has even walked a lite without his cane. I know now that all of his balance problem has been these silly drugs and I only wish that we had clued in a long time ago. I guess when the pills were prescribed last October when he was in the hospital and not sleeping much at all the drugs might have been of a little benefit but once he came home from there we should left the lid on the prescription bottle and we would have been a lot farther ahead. Gary would likely not have had six falls from when he lost his balance etc. Hind sight is 20 - 20 and now we will just go ahead from here.
If he continues to improve the way that he has this past week and his head continues to clear he might even be able to drive the van again before too long. (that is his big desire again).
So friends---------we will keep you updated as far as our amazing life that we are enjoying more every day now and we will thank you eternally for sharing our lives and our journey and ups and downs and tears and praise reports and hurts and pain and happiness.
Love
Sherrill

2009-02-10T19:12:00.000-05:00

We have had a good week so far and with the weather being a little milder has sure made it much nicer. So friends--just wait till you hear our plans for this weekend--being Valentine's Day. We are planning on going away from our own home for the first time since last September when we went to Syndie's for a night when the boys took their dad and went to their annual baseball game. Wow--that seems like such a very long time ago. It was such a big event for us to go to the States and Gary was really starting to do well back then. Of course, as you know, we then had our major set-back and a couple of weeks after that Gary ended up back in the hospital (Oct 1st) and then the operating room and then the past four plus months have been the recuperating from that horrible bad awful painful experience.

So, to think of going away for a couple of days—just the two of us-- is pretty exciting. We are going to a beautiful bed and breakfast near Grand Bend. The photos that I have seen look awesome on the Internet. It actually has an indoor salt water pool (hallelujah) and a hot tub. Of course Gary is not going to be able to use the facilities but he is pretty excited that I will be able swim and use the hot tub. (( At least he says that he is happy for me and I choose to believe him. )) Brian and BJ actually won this little marriage enrichment retreat on a "call-in" Christian radio program. Since they were not sure they could make the arrangements for babysitters etc.to take advantage of this weekend, they generously gave it to Gary and I as a gift. Now how could we have possibly said –No thanks!!! In the package there are six meals included as well, so we just have to pay for the gas to get there and back home. So I say—Happy Valentine’s Day to us.

Gary goes to the Dr. again next Tuesday and we will get the latest report to you then.

Next Monday is Family Day and I have the day off work so it will be a wonderful LONG weekend.

Thanks for sharing our lives.

2009-02-08T11:52:00.000-05:00

Hi everyone,
We have had a good week with no negatives at all. We went for a drive yesterday along the beautiful blue water highway to Sarnia and it was lovely. We saw lots of ice jams and that was cool. (cold :) )

Gary walked a little bit once we got to Point Edward by the bridge.Then we drove home again and he had a rest and then we went out for supper so it was a great day for us.
This morning we went to church and now we are at home watching the Crystal Cathedral. We only stayed at church for just over an hour. Gary finds sitting much longer than that a little too hard when he is not in his comfortable chair.

So, we will keep you posted and updated. We see the doctor on Feb 17th at the hospital here in Chatham and we will get another report on how he thinks Gary is doing.
Love to you all.

Sherrill

2009-02-03T16:28:00.000-05:00

It is nearly a week since we have been to see the wound specialist at the hospital and things seem to be pretty good as far as the healing of the bottom wound is concerned. I have been trying some different things with his chest and it seems to be working really well. It is mind boggling even for me to picture the days when Gary's chest was open to the point of putting a small cushion inside of it. Sometimes when I look back and see the photos of his wounds during the worst days of this past year I can hardly believe that his body could heal from those massive wounds. SO this tiny little jelly bean sized spot on his chest is like a little drop of water in a huge rain barrel. OK--what is a rain barrel??? I sound like my dad talking about such things as if we have rain barrels sitting around in our yards today. :)

I took Gary for a short walk down the street yesterday since a good portion of the road was dry. He did very well and was a little less tipsy than he has been. He has been instructed to just stand still in one spot many times during the day and that position is supposed to help him to regain his balance and also strengthen his legs because he is supporting his own weight as well. He also does the stand up / sit down exercises from a kitchen chair to strengthen his thighs and calves. The muscles are so small right now and he is working hard to build them up.

Yesterday as we walked past the snow covered vinyl wrapped convertible that is sitting in our driveway we were dreaming of the nice weather that is going to be coming within the next two or three months and we said we will take every single opportunity that we have this year to go for long and short drives and let the wind blow all of our troubles away. :) I have always thought it would be wonderful to have boat because when I was a kid we used to have friends with boats and I loved going fast and having the wind blow through my hair and in my face. Thankfully---Gary loves the same thing. However—due to major problems with our backs we have not been able to go the boat route but the convertible is certainly the next best thing. It is probably a lot easier and more accessible and cheaper too.

We call the convertible our TOY and our kids and grandkids refer to it as that as well. In fact, our personalized plates say ---SKS TOY.

We look forward to sending great reports every few days until we can shout from the roof tops----the wounds are healed. :-)

2009-01-29T08:00:00.000-05:00

This is another praise report on an Anniversary date that will never be forgotten by the Kivell family –January 29, 1990. We seem to be adding to our collection of dates that will be eternally etched on our mind while we travel the paths in this old world. Yes it was 19 years ago today that Gary and I were returning from London Ontario and hit a patch of black ice and rolled the van five times and totaled it. (they had trouble finding a junk yard that wanted it because there was hardly a thing on it that they could salvage. I am sure at lot of our support system that we have right now were not involved with our lives back then, but as a family we went through some really tough situations when Gary was rushed to London with a broken neck and a ruptured aorta in his heart and 8 broken ribs and a crushed scapula and the top of his scalp had been torn off and he was a MESS. I was in the Chatham hospital for a week and Gary remained in a London hospital before being transferred back to the Chatham hospital after being there a week. Our poor kids who were still young at the time went through an extremely rough time then too. We have come to the conclusion that God is just not ready for Gary yet and he still has a work for him to do because he has come very close to death a number of times in his life. (at least twice prior to the accident and then a few times in the past year as well) So, as we celebrate the fact that God is in control and He knows what is best and I am so thankful that He knows that my kids still need their dad and that I need a husband and we will be thankful to God for all of his blessings until we stand before Him face to face. It is great to be able to celebrate that we have had 19 years since that horrific date to love Him and to love each other.

2009-01-28T21:34:00.000-05:00

Well once the kids read the blog and heard that their dad had a suspicious looking wound they jumped all over me to get the appointment moved up from this coming Friday, so I called Nicole and she agreed that it was best not to wait and that she would see Gary on Wednesday at noon. So Brian picked him up and got him to the outpatients clinic to see the wound specialist at 12.30 pm today. The visiting home care nurse met him there because she wanted to show the wound specialist why she was concerned. So----they have changed the wound dressing orders and are going to try something a little different. The dressing will still be changed every two days and hopefully will continue to improve. Nicole said she was not really concerned with the condition of the wound now even though it is a little deeper than she had thought. She said that the deep tissue looked healthy and did not appear to be mushy and that she thinks it is continuing to heal well. She told the home care nurse that she was glad that she was being aggressive with her concerns and that we cannot take any risks at this point at all and if there are any other concerns that we are supposed to be at the hospital immediately to see her She said she would have contacted the surgeon if she felt it was necessary but she did not think that it was so we are thrilled that it appears that all is still well. I am glad he has been checked out again and his next appointment there is middle of February so we will keep you posted. His chest wound is still the size of an almond and is stuck at that size. She told me that I need to take a washcloth and give it a little rub on the wound every once in a while just to keep it awake. It sure does not sound like I should do that to brand new skin that we are praying will keep growing-- but I guess that is the new way to do things. I know that there will never be a skin graft and that is the good part of this slow healing process. Gary just simply could not take the thought of going back to an institution for ever a night let a lone a week of treatments for a skin graft. So---please keep whispering his name in your prayers and we will keep you posted. We plan to go away with the kids for a weekend the end of March and I REALLY pray that both wounds will be closed so that Gary can swim in the heated pool. It will be a year in March since we were at the same motel and that is the weekend before things fell apart for our lives. A whole year of troubles and upsets and challenges and scares and tears and sad times and problems and yet through it all there were lots of praise reports and little miracles and so many things to be thankful for. I was thinking the other day about the fact that I never had one problem with our vehicle not starting or having any trouble with it at all while I was in London for so many months and that is so awesome. With all of the thousands of miles that the kids and I put on our vehicles coming and going to that hospital in all kinds of weather and yet God protected us all and kept us safe.
The bonding of our family as we stood in ICU so many many times is something else that is a cherished memory as we move farther away from those horrific hours. We truly do have a lot to be thankful for and we will be forever grateful to God for his goodness to us all. The support of you--our friends-- will be part of hearts till eternity.
Love to all
Sherrill

2009-01-27T04:01:00.000-05:00

It is Monday and we are doing Ok. We had a pretty good weekend and we were really glad to be able to go to some good friends home for supper on Sunday. Gary sat for over two hours and that was great.
The nurse came today and is concerned about the condition of his wound on his bottom and called the wound specialist at the hospital and said that she wants him to see her ASAP. They called today and cannot see him until Friday morning so we will just wait and see what happens with that. I was little anxious, to say the least, when I heard about this latest develop but I am going to choose not to get upset until we have something concrete to base any concerns on. I have not even told the kids yet so this will be a test to see if they read the blog. :) I would have called them if there any real evidence that we were facing another problem. Please pray that there is no set back for us.

We had Gary's mom here for supper tonight because she has not been over to see Gary very much through all of these months of problems. I know she cares about her son too but sometimes he is just not up to too much visiting.
Gary's real personality is not back yet and I am sure that a lot of it is due to the drugs. It will be so nice to look back on all of these negatives and and it will be so nice to have my husband back again. I am still trying to be patient with all of these things and I am looking so forward to having things return in our lives to the way that they used to be a year ago. I told one of our friends tonight that so many things in our lives seem like just precious memories. BUT----I believe there are good things ahead for us. I believe that we will return to a normal happy routine of a husband and wife and we will celebrate all of our victories very soon. I believe we will be able to have some vacations and that Gary will be able to walk without losing his balance and that he will be able to drive again and that he will be able to start to do a few little things to help around the house again and that he will be able to help in the kitchen again. I will just keep believing. ALL things are possible ---we just must believe.
I will keep you posted and we appreciate your thoughts and prayers.

Blessings
Sherrill

2009-01-23T04:13:00.002-05:00

I hope Jim has time to post my blog because he has been very buys playing the role of both mom and dad for the past couple of days because my dear daughter Syndie hurt her back really severely. She is her mother's daughter for sure. The poor girl not only looks like me but she has a back that is build like mine and she has to be so careful that she does not end up with major problems like me. The doctor said my back is like it is made out of glass and it can shatter and I think she is going to have to be careful too. She is on some pretty heavy medicine and off work right now. I wish that I could go and help her but it is just not feasible right now.

Gary is doing great. He has not fallen in over a week now. I have done his dressings twice and that goes well. He has showered twice with the new grab bars and the bath chair. He is still weak and still is very unsteady but we are figuring out the best ways to combat all of that so he stays upright. His ribs are still painful from his falls. He is sure not ready to attempt to have a shower alone yet but that is OK. I am glad that I am a nurse because it sure makes all of these extra tasks easier when I know what I am doing. It has been kinda fun doing the dressing changes again. It has been quite a while since I have been active in nursing care but I guess it is like riding a bike. You can still remember how to do certain things. :) I regret not being more aggressive in London and I should have insisted that they allow me to do Gary's dressings even when he had the Vac. If that had taken place he would have healed up so much faster simply because of the continuity and I would have known what to do instead of having a different person every single time that had no clue about his wounds. I also would have washed my hands and used sterile techniques and that would have kept the infections down. I have so many regrets but the one time I did ask if I could change his wound dressing and they said that I was not covered by the hospital. I accepted that and never asked anymore but what the heck does that mean. Who cares if I was covered by the hospital. Did they thing that Gary would sue me???? I never thought it through until later. But I was very vulnerable and weak and not in a position to be aggressive back then when we were going through so many life and death situations. I also wish I had insisted that they discharge him back to Chatham far sooner than they did and that would have been a great advantage as well BUT that is all hind site. It is funny how when you are in the middle of a situation you do not see clearly or handle things properly. My kids were so supportive of me and I remember many many times keeping them from being strong on my behalf. Because of a couple of situations that happened with some hospital personnel that were supposed to be in authority and yet who acted extremely unprofessionally, it made me fearful to stand up for what was right. The incompetent staff should have been reported and replaced but I was so afraid that their already inferior care for Gary would become worse if we caused any waves. Looking back it was a huge mistake on my part and I have learned from it, but I was very emotionally weak back then.
So-I have been rambling away here about all of the past stuff that we cannot change. I only hope that they learned from all of their errors with Gary and made some positive changes for the next poor patients.

Gary is sooooooooooo anxious to get out of this house. We are going out for suppers occasionally now and he really looks forward to that. He gets so bored at home all day by himself. He is not sleeping the best at night but I think he just is not tired enough sometimes. Once better weather gets hear we can do more activities and that will be good. He is not able to drive yet and so that will be another big hurdle for him to face soon. (well NOT too soon) He is still on too many drugs to let him behind the wheel. Maybe if you live in Chatham you should be on the look out for that day. :)
Just kidding.
Love to all

Sherrill

2009-01-18T21:28:00.001-05:00

Friends ,

It is Sunday evening and we have had a very nice, quiet and uneventful weekend.

We had our friends-- the Cornelius and Vanderlaan's --here for supper on Friday evening and after supper Boots and John installed two grab bars in the bathroom for us. Boots also added antifreeze and windshield washer fluid to the van for me.(Sometimes there are things that I just need a guy to help me with.)

So today Gary got to have a SAFE shower—with my assistance. We decided that because he is top heavy that it makes him off balance in the shower and I sure was glad that he had the bars to give him some much needed support. The fact of standing in one spot and the hot water as well as the built up of the nine anesthetics in a short period of time have caused him to not have any balance and I think that is why he has been falling. I have instructed him that for the next while he is not allowed to shower unless I am at home and there with him. It is just simply too risky.

So then I did the dressing on his bottom wound and his chest wound and that went perfectly. I will start doing them more often and that will save CCAC –the agency where I work—some extra money.

We did not make it to church this morning because our driveway was completely drifted in with snow. Brian was on his way over to shovel and I knew it would take him at least a couple of hours so I told him to head off to church and we would watch the Crystal cathedral this morning and then we also watched our close friend Gary Beesley sing on a video that is posted online. I called the snow removal guy and he was done the driveway with his truck and blade in just about ten minutes. There sure was a lot of snow that has come down lately. It seems a shame to shovel for so long when this guy is so fast. My poor neighbors had both been outside for a long time and I think they were very envious with this truck.

Gary still is suffering a lot with his painful ribs from the latest two falls out of the tub and that will just take time for them to heal. I just asked him if he had anything he wanted to say on the blog and he said just say “OUCH”. What a character.

This afternoon it was so nice and sunny that I took him for a drive to the lighthouse to see all of the snow on the frozen lake. There were lots of people out there snowmobiling and that was entertaining to watch.

We have stayed pretty quiet otherwise and so that is good.

The biggest hurdle we will face now is for Gary to get his strength built back up and that will just take plain old time and endurance on his part. He still sometimes stumbles with unsteadiness and weakness but he keeps on trying.

We are both excited about Spring this year because we totally missed it last year, so that will be a huge treat. It will be nice when the weather clears and the roads are dry and we can walk outside again as well

Thanks for all of your ongoing love and support and messages and emails.

Good night and God bless.

2009-01-15T03:57:00.002-05:00

Today is Wednesday and it is one month until Valentine's Day is here. That is the first special event of the year that we joked about that we are going to celebrate because we are going to plan to celebrate any and every event this year that comes our way. THAT IS ---if I can not only get my husband healthy but also keep him from crushing too many more of his guardian angels and injuring himself in the process. Yup--it is true whether you believe it or not. I got a phone call at work today from the nurse to tell me that Gary had just fallen OUT and over the edge of the tub and ended on the floor again. He hit his head on the counter and hurt his ribs again on the side of the tub. When the nurse called me at work I thought she was honestly going to say that she was teasing me. I kept waiting for her to say--I am just joking but she never said that. She had been with me on Saturday when he fell and she knew how upset I was and I just thought she was calling to me about something else and was just joking but NO JOKE. I simply could not believe it. I just do not understand what is happening. He loses his balance somehow I guess and down he goes-- or over the edge he goes. I keep thinking that I want to go on a cruise but I think that I had better get this man stable on his feet or he will be going over the edge of the deck into the ocean.

The poor homemaker was her with him today when he crashed and I have not talked to her her since it happened. I called her at noon to tell her about the fall on Saturday and to tell her to make sure he stayed safe today. Yeah right!!!
I bought a grab bar yesterday and had it in the van. A lot of good it did Gary in there. I will get someone to install it asap and I have forbidden any more showers for this boy until the grab bar is in place. I bought a bath chair today as well but he says he is not going to use it. He is back to sponge baths for sure. It is nothing short of a miracle that he has not hurt himself seriously with all of these falls. He fell in our bedroom and he fell in the family room twice and now three times in the bathroom. He has hit his head and bruised his ribs and cut himself in numerous places and yet he has been so blessed to not have had a broken bone. It could have happened so easily. Today really upset me because I could just feel the potential of a horrible injury and more hospital stays and I cannot even think of facing that again. It just makes me sick to think about it.

So friends--please keep praying for his safety as well as his healing of his wounds. They are really coming along super the nurse said. I am planning on doing both dressings this weekend so I will let you know Sunday what I think about it.
Have a great day friends and know that you are still all very special to us.

Love
Sherrill

2009-01-10T21:31:00.002-05:00

Today is Saturday and we have had a pretty good week. Tuesday was such a great day and Gary seems to have just had such a lot of emotional energy challenged towards getting completely better since he got such a wonderful report from the doctor. I called and got the results from his blood work and the culture yesterday. He still does have MRSA in his wound but they are not concerned about that. His Hemoglobin is up to within the very lowest acceptable area for a man and that is excellent. It is around 120 instead of 80. His sugar levels were perfect and so was his potassium.
Today the nurse was coming at noon and Gary was in the shower and I was talking to the nurse in the family room when we hear him fall. I was sooooooooooooooo worried but we manged to get him upright. He hurt his ribs on the side of the tub and he also cut his head open a little and he scraped his forearm and his wrist and his hand. He has spent the better part of the day in bed today. So we had a long heart to heart about what we are going to do to prevent any further falls when he told me he thought he had better tell me that he had also fallen in the shower on Thursday and the Lord had protected him from getting hurt. I told him if angels are catching him that I wonder how many he has crushed to death. Oh my goodness. I have told him if he breaks a hip--that I am out of here. Seriously though---he is so lucky that he has not hurt himself more seriously with all of the tumbles that he has taken. Our shower door had broken so I bought a curtain and he thinks that is what made him slip.. On Thursday I guess he landed with his bottom on the side of the tub where the track for the door is and he could really have hurt his wound seriously but thank goodness it did not happen.
So-----we will concentrate on the positive things that have been happening and we will get a grab bar installed the first of the week. We have a bath chair but he does not feel that he needs it right now. I think I will insist that he uses it for a little while. I just have to figure out a way to keep him standing and not doing somersaults in the tub. :) :)
I think we will stay in the house tomorrow instead of going to church and we wil watch church on TV.
Keep us in your prayers. We obviously still need it.

Sherrill

2009-01-07T04:07:00.001-05:00

Dear family and friends,

We are so happy to report that today's medical appointment went even better than we had imagined. Brian took Gary to the hospital to see Dr. Mahoney and he was absolutely thrilled with the look of Gary's wounds. Gary said he thought the Dr. was going to kiss him. The nurse actually did hug him. Gary said the Dr. just went on and on about how pleased he was and how amazing the wound had healed and that it was unbelievable. The doctor obviously does not know the connections that we have with Jesus -the miracle worker that still is working on our behalf. His chest wound is stalled at the size of an almond and that is OK they said. The skin has grown many inches more than they thought it was possible to grow and so we will continue to be patient until this small area seals over. It is a risk for infection if the area is not completed closed. They are now going to change his bottom dressing every two days instead of every day. I am going to start changing the dressings myself sometimes as well. The doctor said that he wanted to make sure that all of this was documented and that there were lots of photos of the wound so they could show other people how such a huge wound healed so amazingly with treatment. I hope the next person has God on their side as well or they might be disappointed with the speed of normal healing otherwise.

We can only thank you for your continued prayers. Gary is trying so hard to regain his strength. He called Brian over here yesterday to take him outside for a walk and that was good. Today after his outing to the hospital, Brian took him out for breakfast and then brought him home and he slept the entire afternoon. His stamina is still so compromised but he did not get this week over night and therefore it is going to take a long time for him to get back to his normal strength. He still takes a fair amount of medication and that has an affect on him as well. He told me yesterday that he just keeps dreaming about all of the things that he wants to do. I guess I sometimes forget how hard this still is for him - especially since I have got part of my life style back again. He said he longs to go places and do things again and I know it will soon be a reality.

I will write again in a few days.

Love
Sherrill

2009-01-05T04:01:00.001-05:00

The first Sunday of the year is here and we went to church today. I told Gary we are going to have to try to find a church that only lasts an hour because ours lasted just shy of two hours and that is just too long for Gary to sit yet. But it was nice to be back there and be part of the congregation. There are so many people there that we did not know. It is strange to go and not know everyone but I guess it is good that there are new people. There are a lot of people who do not go any longer and that is sad for us as well. Changes continue to take place and people continue to change and that is just the way of the world.

Gary will have Brian take him to see the surgeon at the hospital on Tuesday and that will be interesting. I think he will be extremely pleased.

Gary has been in bed all afternoon since he had the big outing this morning. He told me yesterday that he has been wanting a steak so I am going to brave the elements tonight and try to BBQ one for him. I hope the BBQ will get hot enough to do the job.
I am already starting to plan in my mind little weekend get away's that Gary and I might be abe to do this year. We hope to go to the Greenfield again this year with the entire family. It is such a great time to be together and absolutely no work for anyone at all. Just time together and lots of pool time and visiting time and of course there is always some shopping that takes place. :) We were there as a family last year just days before we started on a down hill path. Everything we do this year will be a celebration of life and new beginnings and fresh starts. Once Gary's wounds are healed and he is able to swim and use a hot tub- I would like to go for a weekend to Niagara Falls to a great place that offers a super deal including breakfast both mornings and dinner one night at a steak house and one night at the Skylon. We have been a few times before and it always a special time to break up the cold winter. It would be nice to be heading south but that will not happen so we are willing to settle for a weekend or two away between now and when we can get our own back yard into "summer mode".

Our garage door is now working again and that is good. Friday would have been my mom's ninetieth birthday. That seems so hard for me to believe. There are times when I still just want to pick up the phone and call her about something or drop over there for lunch.

I took Gary for a drive yesterday to see the results of the flooded Thames river. There sure were lots of skating rinks in back yards and parking lots along the entire river area.
So----stay tuned on Wednesday for an update on the Doctor's report.

Love
Sherrill

Happy 2009

2009-01-02T06:59:00.001-05:00

We have finally reached the year 2009----- the year that we have been looking forward to so that we can leave 2008 behind and move forward and we are excited about this year.

I want this year to be full of all kinds of wonderful celebrations with our family and friends and we want to take a little vacation and we want to enjoy good health and happiness this year. Gary and I will be celebrating our 40th wedding anniversary this coming June and we are looking forward to that. We have always talked about going on a cruise to celebrate this milestone, but I think maybe we will look at taking a trip next winter. This winter has been so cold and we have had more snow than usual. I have done my share of shoveling and had to hire a plow one day to get me out of the driveway.

During the holidays we had a problem with the our garage door opener and it would not open at all and so our friend Boots came over and at least made it so I could get it up and down manually. Yesterday I went and bought a new opener at Sears and it will be installed tomorrow so that will make it better. I could have put it up and down myself but Gary will soon want to start driving again and that would be to
Then at Christmas we found out that we have a little trouble with the bathroom downstairs and we need a new "flusher" to keep the water from running for hours at a time. I will have Brian take care of that for us tomorrow.

Tuesday is when Gary goes to the hospital to see Dr. Mahoney and Nicole and I am sure they are going to be shocked at the healing that has taken place in Gary's wounds. It has been a month since he saw them so a lot has changed.

I just want to take this time to thank my son-in-love Jim for adding photos and for adding the video of Gary telling the kids the Christmas story. I did not even know he had video running during that time so it was a surprise to see that today when I checked to see if he had updated the blog when he got back from their vacation. I hope you watched their fun video as well. I appreciate the fact that Jim is so good about keeping everyone updated for me.

So friends----have a great day today as we celebrate the beginning of a brand new wonderful and exciting year.

Photo's and Video of Kivell Christmas

2008-12-31T13:34:00.004-05:00

Christmas 2008

2008-12-31T08:54:00.001-05:00

The Merry Christmas celebrations are all behind us now for another year. I think we had the best Christmas that we have ever had. We all have a refreshed perspective on what is important in our lives and we are so glad that we have each other to share our special times with. All of our kids arrived home on Christmas afternoon and we had a great time around the tree and then eating and eating and eating. Around 9.00 pm Brian and Ben and their wives took their kids all home to get them to bed at Brian's place and then the girls and their husbands went there to play a game and Gary I kept the six bigger kids here with us. I got Gary settled into bed about midnight and I woke him up Boxing Day at 11.15 am. just before the nurse came to do his wounds. Boxing Day was good as well and we played games and Gary managed really well until he went to get up from the couch and his legs gave out on him and he went down on the carpet. He said his knee buckled and it hurt the rest of the day. The boys had gone out to the store so it was a bit of a challenge for us to get Gary up from the floor since he did not seem to have any strength in his legs. I was glad that the girls were here to help him. We all stayed up late again last night. Syndie and Jim left the earliest because they were leaving today for a five day trip to Chicago. That was the present that they gave to their kids for Christmas so they were pretty excited. They had no trouble at the boarder coming or going so that was nice. If you would like to see Syndie's kids get their gift on video you can watch it on YouTube. Sami is her mother's daughter for sure. :)

Then Suzie and Steve left and got caught in that nasty rainy foggy weather and they had a horrid trip home. Today Brian and Ben and their families have gone to the states shopping. Gary and I just needed day to be quiet. The two days when the twenty of us were all together could not have been better though. Every was healthy and the kids all get along so well and we just has a wonderful time.
Today we have just watched a couple of movies and I have also fallen asleep a few times when I was sitting between cleaning jobs.
I hope that each one of you had a beautiful Christmas celebration with your family and friends.
Love
Sherrill

Merry Christmas From Gary and Sherrill

2008-12-24T16:17:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is the birthday of our friend Jesus and I hope that you are planning the party with Him at the center of all of your celebration. We are so excited that the entire family is coming home to celebrate this day with us. Our Christmas will definitely be different but that is OK. We have so much to be thankful for this year.

Every time I drive past the hospital I cannot help but look up at all of those rooms and thank Jesus that Gary is home in our own house.

Today we are going over to Brian's for supper and he also invited Gary"s mom. It will be a different year for her without Allan. The first year is always the hardest they say.

We are going to have our traditional "make your own pizza" on Christmas day. We started that tradition about 25 years ago when we were singing at so many Christmas banquets and we ate so many turkey dinners during December and then we had the Kivell extended family at our house for a turkey dinner on Dec 24th (we finally moved that to the church) and then the Pearson Christmas turkey dinner was always held on Dec.26th at mom and dad's place and so no one wanted turkey on Christmas Day and we decided on Pizza. Now--all of these years later no one wants to change the tradition and return to a traditional Christmas meal. A couple of years ago we started having the turkey on Boxing Day because I missed having turkey left over's. So----this year we are not having the dinner but Brian is cooking a turkey and we will have the left over's on home made buns on Boxing day. All we wanted this year was to have the entire family home and be together to celebrate LIFE and returning health.

The kids always bring so much stuff to eat and I made 6 dozen butter tarts and we are having cheese balls and crab dip and bacon wrapped chestnuts and perigees and as I said--home made buns and cinnamon buns as well so you see we will not starve at all. :) :)

We have all been trying to ""cut -down"" but I think we will pick those plans back up in January.

We- as a family--want to thank you soooooooooooo much for all of your love and support and friendship and prayers and gifts and expressions of love and kind words and visits and treats. You have truly blessed us and it will make us different people as we enter a new year together. Thanks for being part of our lives. We love you and pray that you have a wonderful time this season with your family and friends.

2008-12-21T21:49:00.000-05:00

Snowstorms and Chatham are finally connected. I think everyone else has had lots of snow but we finally got included in the downfall of white stuff. The roads were not nice Friday morning at all. If you know Chatham--I could not see McDonald's from the corner at the Wheels. It was really NOT nice. 17 people called in absent on Friday due to the weather. There were very few people at work but we got most of the work completed and that is all that really matters.

I went out a noon for a short while and it was OK on most of the roads.

Gary was supposed to go the hospital on Friday to meet the Dr. and to see Nicole S the wound specialist but she lives in Blenheim and she did not venture out to go to work either. So, I called the Dr. and canceled his appointment. The nurse will come and change the dressing anyway and I am praying all is well until January 5th when the next appointment is booked. I figured with the roads the way that they were on Friday that he did not need to take any risks going out into the storm.

Can you believe that next week at this time all of the celebrations will be winding down and people will be started to think about putting all of their decorations away and getting their homes back to a semblance of order. We usually leave our things out until the first of the year but if one of my kids offer to help put things away while they are in town I am sure I could be persuaded to put it all away by the 27th. :)

Yesterday Bob and Nancy called and asked us if we could meet them for breakfast and Gary was glad to make that effort too. Every thing he does is a big effort but he is always willing to try. Every thing that he does will hopefully make the next time easier. Gary made the effort to to go to church today because he had been asked to share for a minute about the past ten months and then to light the advent candle. The weather way cold and and windy and snow was blowing but we ventured out. We only stayed for about an hour but he was glad that he got to go. I went out for a couple of hours with BJ this afternoon to pick up stuff for the big day. This weekend I made 6 dozen shells for butter tarts and I bought the stuff to make bacon wrapped chestnuts and chocolate covered pretzels and a few other little things. I will be baking the tarts on Tuesday or Wednesday and then I am also making home made buns and cinnamon bun on Christmas morning. That has become a life long Christmas tradition. On Wednesday--Christmas Eve--we are going to go to Brian and BJ's for supper. That will be nice. Tonight I made Gary BBQ spareribs for supper and he sure enjoyed that. Our sister-in-love Sherry brought us delicious chili on Friday and she bought enough for three meals so we have enjoyed that as well.

We hope and pray that everyone will stay healthy and safe over the holidays and that all of your traveling will be without any problems.

Please know how important you are to us. We would never have made it through this year without your love and prayers and support.

Sherrill

2008-12-19T06:51:00.001-05:00

THIS IS THE EMAIL FROM MONDAY AND TUESDAY

Monday was so exciting for Gary because he got to say good-bye to his VAC. It is like he has a new lease on life since he is not attached to that machine. He was sooooooooo looking forward to being disconnected and just going back to regular saline packing dressings. He actually was dressed in a sweat suit and sitting on the couch when I arrived home from work on Monday. That was a first because since the end of September he has been in bed. he was just grinning because he was sitting up. We actually ate supper in the dining room-and while we were eating Gary said that he thought we should go to Walmart after supper. I told him it was frigid cold outside but he said he would bundle up warm and he just wanted to go and ride the scooter for a few minutes. He is SO weak and his legs are so shaky but after he had a little rest we headed to Walmart for nearly a half an hour.

Yesterday - Tuesday he called me at work and said that he was wondering if we could go out for supper. I think he has been laying in bed just dreaming of all of things that he wants to do now that he can begin sitting. Last night he said he could not believe how much pain he had around his hips and his middle and we figured out that was due to the fact that all of a sudden he has started sitting and we never thought about the fact that all of the muscles you use to sit have been not used for three months except for little outtings to the hosptial to see the Dr.

However-----he just called me a few minutes ago at work and told me that he is sitting up on the couch again watching TV.

OK---I am home again now. So we went to Jersey's for supper for about half an hour and he managed well. I wrote to you about his plans for today (Thursday) and they all worked out for him--inspite of our problem last night. I will copy what I wrote to the kids this morning before 4 am. this morning.

Hi kids,

I am up because dad just fell on the floor in the bedroom and hit his head really hard on the floor and he never made it to the bathroom. L On Monday he asked me if he could try to sleep in our room again and I was nervous that I might bump into one of his wounds but he wanted to try to sleep back in our bedroom. I heard him trying to sit up on the bedside and he said he had to go to the bathroom and I asked him if he was ok and he said YES.

The next thing I knew he crashed to the floor at the end of the bed crying out---ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch. He actually hit his head on the floor and that and he said that was why he was saying ouch. His head was bleeding a little on his forehead. I got a dining room and with a lot of effort I got him to crawl up onto it and then I got him into the bathroom (too late)

I wanted to call Brian, but he wanted to try to get up on his own. We tried and tried and tried before we had made it up on the chair. He staggered back to bed and said he was ok but that his head still hurt. I can only tell you that when I heard him crash to the floor that my heart went immediately into my throat. My adrenalin was racing so fast that I could have gone outside and shoveled the entire Coverdale Street. My fear of him falling has now come to pass. So while I was talking to him after 5 am this morning, while we were trying to get settled back to sleep before I had to get up-- I asked him why he felt he had fallen. He told me that he had also fallen a couple of weeks ago during the night when he had tried to get up to use the commode chair while he was in the family room. He said that it took him quite a while to crawl over to the couch and make his way back up onto it and then back to bed. He said he did not tell me because he did not want me to worry.
What a guy!!!! He is so weak and shaky that it sure does scare me to leave him on his own while I am at work..

2008-12-17T17:19:00.000-05:00

I wrote a long email but I left it at the office so I will send it tomorrow so I do not have to retype everything.

Tomorrow there is a Loads of Love Christmas dinner and the volunteers have invited Gary to join them in their celebration and so John C is going to pick Gary up and take him to this outing. He is really looking forward to the outing. Tonight at 8pm we are meeting my three sisters and their husbands and also Judy's husband at Mike's place for a little Pearson Christmas celebration and Gary wants to attempt to go to that for a little while as well. I think he feels like he has missed out on sooooooooo much stuff that he wants to take every opportunity that is coming near him right now. I am going out with Brian and BJ to see Gracie in her very first Kindergarten school concert.

Gary’s wound appears to be doing ok and we see Dr. Mahoney on Friday. Can you believe that Christmas is going to be over next week. It hardly seems possible.

So lovely people-----keep Jesus as the center of your celebrations this year.

So this will be out of order but I will send it in the morning to Jim. I wrote an update on my lunch hour.

2008-12-15T08:34:00.000-05:00

We accomplished another goal friends and Gary made it to our church for the presentation of “How Mr. Sodd found Christmas” . We thought he might only stay for half of it but he stayed nearly to the end. We took a lawn chair and his ROHO cushion. That kind of cushion is like an big rubber egg carton type thingamajig. It always air movement under a person when they sit. He stood up a few types and then would sit back down but he did really well. We went a few minutes late on purpose and left just before it was finished. He was tired and weak but did well. He has started back doing his leg strengthening exercises this past week because as of Monday when the VAC is removed he is going to have more freedom to walk and move around and sit and stand and yahoo!!! He is just SO weak from this long “bed experience” again and has done very little since Oct. 1st. He said his legs felt like spaghetti when he was walking into the church.

He sees the surgeon and the wound nurse again on Friday and they will decide if the wound dressing needs to be changed every day or every other day. This week it will be every day.

My sister Ruth Ann and her husband from Tillsonburg are leaving for the south for the winter months and they will pass through Chatham this Wednesday and so my other two sisters and their husbands are planning on meeting for a little time together at a restaurant and we are going to plan to join them for a short time. Yeah! It is nice to be able to think about doing some little outings again. You do not miss what you have never had and I miss going out a huge lot because we use to always be on the go-- doing something. I remembering loving to have an entire evening just to stay at home and do nothing. Now---I look forward to any little event that involves getting out of our house or involves other people. I am such a funny creature!!! Edik---you were not to laugh and agree so heartily with that last statement.

Ok—I owe---I owe---so off to work I go!!

2008-12-12T04:00:00.001-05:00

Hi guys,

It is so nice to get some emails from you so please go ahead and send us a note now and then. Or Sue C. – you could give me a call so I could talk to a real person.

Gary had his VAC changed again today and his PICC line dressing as well. The doctors have decided to leave that line in his arm----just in case another infection ever surfaced. They said it is just a security measure. His next hospital appointment is Dec 19th at 1.30 and he is supposed to fast until then and have blood work done. I am not sure how that will work!!

I will write a “story” tomorrow about flour and oil---but since I am still not feeling the best I am going to go and get Gary medicated and tucked into his bed and then I am heading for my bed.

Good night.

ssk

2008-12-11T04:09:00.000-05:00

It is now Wednesday night and Gary had a good day. He had his son Brian and his brother Vaughn over this afternoon and they played a game and that was nice for him and helped to pass some time.

I talked to the wound nurse today and they have decided to remove the VAC next Monday and go back to normal saline wet dressing changes every day. Gary is so excited about having the machine removed because then he can regain some of his freedom and will be able to start sitting a little more. It has been since the first of October that he has not been able to sit much at all.

He has a LONG way to go to regain his strength and get back to where we were the first part of October but he is willing to work hard to do that.

We are thanking the Lord that the reports have been positive. They did another culture on Tuesday and we will find out the results of that in a couple of days.

I had another pretty rough day today but this evening I have been feeling better.

Thanks for reading and keeping us in your prayers. If you are still connected to this blog you are indeed a true friend and we love you for your support.

Sherrill

news from Sherrill

2008-12-10T08:28:00.001-05:00

I had promised a longer letter today but I ended up at the doctor yesterday because I was not feeling well. I went to bed really early last night and never took the time to update the computer. It was tough waiting on him and preparing his supper when I felt so rough. However-today is a brand new day.

Gary’s appointment went well at the hospital and the wound is healing exceptionally well the doctor said. He is always a good healer but it has been these silly infections that he picks up and they do not seem to be aware of them and then they slice him open again. We are praying that this time ALL of the healing will be complete and that the wound is closing below the area that is visible as well. They did a culture and we will get those results in a few days.

The chest wound has stalled at the size of a quarter now and they covered the entire wound with silver nitrate to try to “wake it up”. That is the expression they used. I feel like I need to be covered with some silver nitrate this morning myself.

Off to work.

ssk

2008-12-09T04:13:00.000-05:00

I think I am a day behind again with my update but that is because I was spoiling Sherrill for a day. I will write about that tomorrow.

Gary is still going forward. He sees the surgeon tomorrow at the hospital and then the wound nurse will change both dressings. I will be anxious to hear their comments.

I will write a real update tomorrow since it is now after midnight.

Love

ssk

2008-12-05T20:57:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was another great day for both Gary and me. He called me at work about 4.15 pm and asked me what we were having for supper and I told him I was not quite sure yet. He said he had been craving an Andy's pizza ( a little local restaurant) and wondered if I would pick up a pizza on my way home for supper. I told him that I was very sorry that I could not do that--BUT----if he was willing to get dressed in a nice warm sweat suit that I would be more than happy to take him out on our first date in a very long time.

I told him we could have FIFTY FIRST DATES in the next while. :)

So I called Andy's and ordered a pizza to be ready at 6.00 pm and so when we arrived there and we sat down at the table and the waitress came and asked what we wanted to drink and I said that we would both have water and that our pizza should be ready in the kitchen. The poor girl was a little more than surprised but brought our pizza within the minute. I had taken Gary's ROHO cushion and so he sat for nearly twenty minutes and again it was so nice for us to be out of our own little house and feel like we were part of the real world again - even if it was just for a short period of time. I am sure some of the other people in the restaurant were wondering what kind of pull we had to be served without even placing an order. :):)

When we left there we actually drove over to Brian and BJ's and Gary went in there for about five minutes just to see their kids and the Christmas decorations. He had not been there of course since the end of September.

So, this weekend we will try to do a couple more little outings and I am sure that each one that we do will last a little longer and it will be a little easier for Gary as his strength improves.

We were joking that someone could have had a baby in the amount of time that Gary has been out of circulation. I think that would have been a lot more fun than this----but just not for us. Ha ha ha ... I just got home and he said he had a very lonely boring day because the nurse did not come today and neither did the home maker.

More tomorrow friends.

SSK

2008-12-04T03:58:00.001-05:00

We had a great outing at John and Sue C. for supper. Gary had a little time to lay down on the couch before supper and then sat at the table and ate and then laid down again for a while and then we came back home and he went straight to bed and to sleep. He said that it takes all of his energy but that he had a really good time.

So we are going to keep doing things and I know he will keep improving. He sees the surgeon on Tuesday so that will be interesting as well.

Thanks for your support.

ssk

2008-12-03T08:18:00.001-05:00

Gary had a good, but quiet day with no outings. His brother came by and brought him a Tim Horton’s coffee in the afternoon so that was good and helped pass another long hour for him. You can only imagine how long his days are when I am at work and he is here alone a lot of the time.

We are going on a HUGE outing when I get home from work. We are invited to go to John and Sue C’s. for supper and so can Gary can semi lay down on the way there in the van and then Sue will have the couch ready for him to lay down when we arrive and then we will have supper with them and then head home or he can lay on their couch again. It will be a great treat for me and I know it will be wonderful for Gary to get out of these walls again and see other things and other people. He is just so so so weak-- so it is a great effort for his body to make these outings but we are going to keep doing it. He can only get stronger as we keep on getting out more and doing more things. I just had a thought as I am typing. If any of you want company for supper during the next little while just give me a call. Hahaha.

Once Gary can sit for more than ten minutes, things will be so much better for him. Thanks for reading. Love to all.

ssk

2008-12-02T08:21:00.000-05:00

I think I forgot to write yesterday but I meant to. I am sorry. I spent a lot of time on the phone checking into purchasing a laptop. Things are still going in the right direction for Gary. On Sunday we went for another little outing for coffee to Boots and Alice V’s. Gary thoroughly enjoyed looking at their Christmas tree and having other people to visit with. It was raining by the time we got outside to leave our house and Boots met us at the car with an umbrella and helped Gary into the house and then we left he did the same so we got along great.

On the way home I asked Gary how he felt about our outings and he said it took a lot of effort but it was worth it just to get out of the house. It does exhaust him completely but every time we do it I am sure it will get easier for him as he starts to regain more of his strength that he has lost.

Yesterday the nurse and the PSW were here and things are stilling going well.

I think Gary is starting to feel a little better because he asked me if some night we could have a pizza for supper and then he said he wanted Chinese Food. So that is a good sign too. It is especially good for me. One less time in the kitchen to cook!!

I woke up at four am again today and I prayed and prayed and then turned the lights on and read for a while but I stayed in bed this time so nothing traumatic happened like a few weeks ago when I got up early. I learned my lesson. I just never got back to sleep and so it will be a LONG day I am sure.

Hard to believe that we are now into December friends. Yikes!!

Love to all

ssk

2008-11-30T00:54:00.001-05:00

Today was a good day. I took Gary for a little van ride in the sunshine and then we went to his brother Vaughn’s place for a half and hour. He decided to lay on their couch while we were there. Gary had no idea how weak he really was and even though he had a cane he nearly lost his balance a number of times getting to the van and then into their house -- just because he was so weak. He said he enjoyed the outing and when we got home he was asleep within five minutes. He slept for a couple of hours straight and the kids all came here after they had been at Sloan’s and the babies were in the same room and he never even stirred. I finally had to wake him up when everyone was here and they were all in the room with him and it was time to eat. I am sure he would have slept through the event, just from complete exhaustion from our outing but he enjoyed it and we will go somewhere again tomorrow if the weather is ok—just to get him started back into getting out of this house.

I had a nice time with most of the kids being here but I missed Jim and Syndie’s family. However—Christmas will be here very soon and the Lord willing we will all be together then.

I am really tired tonight so it is off to bed. (It is already nearly 11 pm )

Nite

ssk

A Thanksgiving Prayer

2008-11-28T12:01:00.001-05:00

Today is THANKSGIVING in the states and so we are talking a lot about that at our house because we have family in the states. In fact--our son-in-love Jim has this on his site and without his permission, I copied it to print here. They say it is easier to get forgiveness than permission. :) Thanks Jim
Nov 27

Oh, God, when I have food, help me to remember the hungry. When I have work, help me to remember the jobless. When I have a warm home, help me to remember the homeless. When I am without pain, help me to remember those who suffer. and in remembering, help me destroy my complacency and stir my compassion. Make me concerned enough to help, by word and deed, those who cry out for what we take for granted.

Samuel Pugh

Isn't that a great prayer? We have so much to be thankful for even though we are travelling a bit of a rough road. God has blessed us with a wonderful family and great friends and we are trusting him for great health for 2009.
Today has been an OK day for Gary. He stays pretty close to his bed but is not feeling too many more affects from the c-diff so that is good.
Ben and Sarah and Jack are coming home this weekend and Suzie and Steve are going to drop in as well. Brian and BJ and their kids will join and Ben and Suzie's family's and go to Sloans for an outing to get a Christmas tree. Syndie and Jim wanted to join them but this weekend was not good for them because Jim's family is still there for their Thanksgiving celebration. It is hard to book a time when everyone is available. The Lord willing we will all be together soon for our limited Christmas celebrations. It is less than a month away now.
I guess a lot of people have snow but we do not even have one tiny speck. That is just fine with me for right now. I am not really that great with a shovel. :)
The nurse will be here tomorrow and the Case Manager is also coming to see Gary tomororw. I will update more on the weekend. Gary's chest wound seems to be stalled at this point and it was getting so close to being healed over so we will just pray that it will keep healing in the right direction.
Good night and lets all be thankful for many things today.

2008-11-26T08:59:00.001-05:00

Well friends – I think Gary is doing a little better each day after a very bad time with C-diff. He still spends 23 ½ hours every single day in bed (the other few minutes is on the commode. J and it is really getting to him. He sits in the side of the bed to eat if he is feeling well enough but we have not been in the dining room for a couple of weeks now. BUT---maybe by next week he will feel like that again.

Thanks for not giving up on us. We are going to make it through to the end of 2008 and then January 2009 will be the beginning of a really wonderful year. Please Lord. J PLEASE.

Good night friends

ssk

2008-11-24T04:01:00.000-05:00

Today I decided to get up and go to church while Gary was asleep. I was just about ready to leave when the phone rang and it woke Gary up but he told me I could still go to church and he would try to go back to sleep. When I got home he had gotten up and got himself a little breakfast so that was good. He is feeling a little better today than he was yesterday and yesterday was better than the day before. The medication that the Dr. gave him has kicked into gear and so he is making far less trips to the commode chair.

After lunch we had a great surprise (especially nice for me) when Paul and Mildred Sweet came to the door with two Swiss Chalet Chicken dinners for us for supper tonight. Awesome. They had a short visit with Gary and prayed with him and then left. A little while later John and Sue C came for a visit so it was nice for Gary to see someone besides me for a little while. Then he went to sleep and I went to the store to get some repeats on his medication. Unfortunately when I got there they were not open. L

I am going to head to bed early tonight. cuz I feel really tired. I wrapped a little gift for each of our four kids today. This Christmas is going to be so different for our family. I have not had any time to devote to much shopping this year and I guess I have not really been in the mood. Gary and I usually do that together and often it is done in the states throughout the year when I find good sales. (hospital gift shops do not over that much fun stuff –ha-ha) We are not going to cook a turkey dinner this year because it is a little crowded with Gary's hospital bed in the family room where we usually set up tables for the kids and so for this year we decided to just have finger foods so that we do not have so much last minute preparation and clean up in the kitchen. Next year everything is going to be back to normal we hope and pray and trust and believe. Since we started this ordeal before Easter we decided that it really did not matter if Christmas was part of ALL of the events that will be more special for all of our family next year. The most important thing this year is that we will all be together under one roof and we will be able to share and laugh and eat and play and as I said---just be together. We really do have a lot to be thankful for and we are so glad that God has spared Gary's life even though there were many times from April and right up to October
that we could have lost him. We might never be able to understand all of things that we have had to face this year but we do know that God is in control and that He has brought us through this far and we must trust Him with our present and with our future because He has taken care of our past. We will continue to trust Him and believe that He has good plans for our future.

2008-11-22T21:15:00.000-05:00

Today has been an OK with not much change—except a few less trips to the commode chair for Gary than he had yesterday.

I went to work early today for a few hours while Gary was sleeping. Figured I might as well store up a few hours to use when he is feeling better and we can leave these walls.

However—every time I start to think I am getting cabin fever and feel like I am getting tired of these walls -----I remember the fact that I AM HOME and not pacing hospital halls and parking in parking lots.

So I will write more later but we seem to be moving ahead in the right direction today.

We are watching Christmas videos today.

2008-11-21T04:57:00.000-05:00

Thursday

This will be a short update before I go to bed my friends. The Doctor called me at work today to tell me that Gary does have C-Diff. It is a nasty infection in the bowel due to the massive amounts of antibiotics that Gary has been on and partly due to the long length of stay in the hospital. He started Gary on a different antibiotic today and that is Flagyl. I hope it helps him Weird that antibiotics can cause it and then they give you more antibiotics to treat it. More tomorrow friends.

This is off the internet:

Definition

Healthcare associated infections — illnesses you acquire during a stay in a hospital or aren't new. But in recent years, the infections have reached epidemic proportions in hospitals and nursing homes around the world. One of the most widespread and potentially serious of these illnesses is caused by the bacterium Clostridium difficile, often simply called C. diff or C. difficile.

C. difficile bacteria are everywhere — in soil, air, water, human and animal feces, and on most surfaces. The bacteria don't create problems until they grow in abnormally large numbers in the intestinal tract of people taking antibiotics or other antimicrobial drugs. Then, C. difficile can cause symptoms ranging from diarrhea to life-threatening inflammations of the colon. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, each year in the United States C. difficile is responsible for tens of thousands of cases of diarrhea and at least 5,000 deaths. And the problem is getting worse. C. difficile isn't confined exclusively to hospitals. It's also a growing problem among otherwise healthy people. And although the infection can usually be controlled with antibiotics, virulent strains of C. difficile are now appearing that resist treatment with common medications.

Symptoms

Some people who are infected with C. difficile never become sick, though they can still spread the infection. Others have bouts of watery diarrhea, often with nausea and abdominal pain and cramping. And an increasing number of people develop colitis or pseudomembranous colitis — severe inflammations of the colon. Signs and symptoms of these potentially life-threatening illnesses include:

§ Profuse, watery diarrhea — 10 or more bowel movements a day

§ Fever, often greater than 101 F

§ Abdominal pain, which may be severe

§ Blood or pus in the stool

§ Nausea

§ Dehydration

§ Weight loss

Most people develop C. difficile infection during or shortly after a course of antibiotics, but signs and symptoms may not appear for weeks or even months after treatment has stopped.

In hospitals and nursing homes, C. difficile travels from patient to patient mainly on the hands of caregivers, but also on cart handles, bedrails, bedpans, toilets, bathing tubs, stethoscopes, thermometers — even telephones and remote controls. What's more, the bacteria produce hardy spores that can persist in a room for weeks or months.

The chance of illness increases with the length of the hospital stay. Symptoms often begin in the hospital, but they can also appear weeks or even months after discharge. In longterm care facilities, older adults may be reinfected so often that C. difficile infections become chronic.

2008-11-19T20:43:00.001-05:00

OK before you read any further-- just be aware of the fact that I am about to vent. If you do not like details or venting-- please wait until tomorrow to read the next update on Gary. OK here goes!!!!

I woke up just after 3.30 am and I could not get back to sleep. I knew it was too late to take a little sleeping pill so I tried and tried and tried and prayed and prayed and then finally at 4.45 am I decided to get up and do something productive until it was time to go to work. For the life of me, I have no idea what I thought I would do at that time of the early morning with Gary sleeping soundly in the family room. However---I got up—went have a shower and then decided to get a flashlight and sneak into the family room to see if Gary had used the commode chair during the night. I needed to check because the Dr. had ordered three different specimens in three different bottles. So---sure enough---I could tell he had been up numerous times during the night. I quietly and carefully removed the container and carried it to the bathroom by the light of my flashlight, and then proceeded to play with the pooper scooper to get the little containers ready for the lab. I added water from the bathtub spout to the big pot and dumped it into the toilet and I decided it needed to be rinsed again and I had the pot half filled with water from the tub again when I heard this horrid sound of water splashing as---YUP----you are right----the toilet was running over –all over everywhere. The toilet has a high rise seat on it with arms so I had trouble dislodging the plunger that sits behind the toilet. Oh--- HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!!---You never saw such as mess in your life as the one that I was now in. I grabbed the closest thing I could and it was my huge bath towel that has my name embroidered on it. (that towel will never be the same again) For the next forty minutes I cleaned the bathroom and washed and re-washed the floor and ------------do I need to go on??? Do you get the picture???? Do you wish you had taken my suggestion and stopped reading at the beginning??? So---not only was I not doing anything productive –I was creating mega messes. I left for work at 6.25 am even though I do not normally start until 8.30 am. As I drove to work I thought –“what could possibly be worse ?” and I said right out loud---“well –Gary could still be in a horrible hospital and instead he is home safe and sound in his own little home.”

So there are still things to be thankful for and I am thankful that he was here and not in a London or Chatham hospital.

I think I will go to bed early tonight and I think that all of the rest of the contents of the commode will be thrown outside in the back yard. JUST KIDDING.

More tomorrow about Gary and how he is feeling. Today was just about me.

Good night every one.

ssk

Tuesday morning:

2008-11-19T04:26:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I get so tired at night that I forget to update the blog until someone tells me that they went to check for updates and there were none there. Whoops.

We have had some tough days with "the RUNS" and that has caused some extra stress and increased the already very weakened condition of my man. I called the Dr. and he prescribed some pretty strong stuff over the phone for him and so Brian is picking him up and taking him to the Dr. for 11.30 this morning. I will meet them there.

I do not know if anyone will remember, but last April I fell when I was staying with Katherin and Toby in London when I got back to their place very very late one night after being with Gary in ICU and I missed the two little steps in their front hall.

I kinda hit the wall with my hand and really jammed my thumb and it hurt a huge amount at that point and for a long time after that but I never did anything about it other than complain a lot and show my kids how bruised and swollen it was then. They kept telling me I needed to get it checked but it seemed so incidental compared to all of the life and death situations that we were facing during those months. Well unfortunately the pain has never gone again and has actually increased lately and so I went to a physiotherapist yesterday and he refused to touch it. He is sending me the Dr. today and he said that I need x-rays on it before he will try to help me. I cannot write and I am very dominantly left handed so it is causing me a lot of stress--besides the pain. I tried to get the gas cap off the van last night and had a horrible time doing that and this morning I could not do up my buttons on my top. I guess I will need to wear pullovers sweaters from now on. J Off to work friends.

OK---it is now bedtime and the Dr’s appointment went well. He is doing some tests on Gary’s condition and has ordered more “pills”. The cultures came back with MRSA in his chest wound and the bottom wound results are still pending. His potassium is low and his electrolytes are out of whack and so we will just keep trying to get everything sorted out. The pharmacist spent a lot of time giving me some natural stuff to try to help which I thought was really nice. He said that he needs to be taking a few teaspoons of honey every day. He said he needs to be drinking V8 juice and also Gatorade to get the blood levels back to normal. He said we need to avoid protein right now and the nurses have said to have high protein for his wound healing and so it is a little hard to help the bowel problem and the wound healing. He said he needs to have up to 2500 mg of Vitamin C a day in stead of 500. WOW!!! So—it is all worth a try.

The Doctor did send me for an x-ray so we will see what kind of damage I did 7 months ago. He figures that I either broke my thumb or tore all of the ligaments. L All I know is that it hurts. L

Tomorrow is Wednesday and them just two more days before the weekend. YES!!!

I will try to keep this updated more faithfully.

Love

Sherrill

2008-11-16T09:30:00.000-05:00

Hi friends,

I think that whatever Gary has that keeps him from sleeping is contatious because it seems to be affecting me too. At 1.30 am this morning I could not decide whether to turn on the TV or just keep trying to get to sleep. So-- I kept trying and trying to get to sleep and finally I thought I would check the time again and if it was not past 3 am I was going to take a sleeping pill. Well--it was 3.03 ----just enough past that I said to myself--I am sure my clock is fast :) so I got up and took a sleeping pill and got to sleep and slept well until the phone woke me ups this morning--thanks Ben :) It was after 9.30 so I could not be too upset. :)

Gary was up to the bathroom many many times last night and then today again he has had an awful time. He goes to see the Dr. on Tuesday and that will be a good thing. The nurse will be here tomorrow to do his dressing on his chest and then Monday for his bottom.

I went into work for three hours to day to do some catch up stuff. Then I went to No Frills and on the way home it was snowing so much and the flakes were so huge that each one that hit the windshield was like an big splash. I got the the corner of King Street and William Street and I stopped for a red light and for no sensible reason on earth, I started to drive right through the intersection even though my light was still red. I simply was not paying attention and I acted as if it was a four way stop or something. A car coming from the right side of me (who had the green light) just missed smashing into the passengers side of our van but he swerved out around me as I hit my brakes. If there had have been any cars stopped for the red light coming towards me, he could never have swerved out and around me. All of the way home I just kept repeating—thank you Jesus-thank you Jesus. It would have totally been my fault and I am soooooooooooo thankful that the Lord protected me . I got home safe and found Gary in just a mess so I am glad that he took care of me so I could get home.

Gary is still in need of your prayers and just wants so much to be able to get feeling better. Christmas is coming far too soon and we want to have things a lot better by then.

Good night friends.

ssk

2008-11-13T04:20:00.001-05:00

Gary started on new sleeping pills on Monday night and I gave it to him around 10 pm and he was told to stay in bed because these pills would make him very dopey and so I got him tucked in and I went to bed.

Unfortunately he has been having a huge problem with diarrhea and so I heard him up during the night a number of times but he said he was OK when I called to him. When I got ready to leave for work at 7.45 am he was STILL awake and had not been to sleep yet. He never did go to sleep until 10.30 am and he slept until noon, after the effects of this super sleeping pill had worn off I am sure that he is having adverse reactions to a lot of his medication these days. Last night he slept for five hours so he has been in a much better mood today and a little more talkative.

The PSW that we have gets along really well with him and that is a real plus for me. I have been working a few extra hours this week when someone is here with Gary and so that is good as well. The nurse said today that his wound is healing well. Cultures were supposed to be taken on Monday but the nurse forgot at the hospital until after the dressings were on his wounds so the nurse took them today and took them to the hospital as a favor, but for some reason the person in charge there did not know what to do with cultures that the nurse brought when the patient was not there as well so she threw them out and now they have to take more cultures on Friday. OH BOY!!!!!!!

I had a nice break today when I went out for lunch with my three sisters. My oldest sister Ruth Ann was on her way home from California so she stopped in Chatham and we all arranged our schedules to meet up with her for an hour. Marion and I had to arrange our lunch times and I think Jackie was off work today. It is always strange when we get together and there are only four of us instead of five. We never get together but what we talk about Judy and the fact that is seems impossible that she has gone to heaven. It is also strange as well that we are at the age where we talk about our illnesses and aches and pains and wondering what will happen to who next. ((Boy –that was a rambling sentence.)) Mike and Mary came over today and helped us again—Thanks guys. And my pool is now closed for the winter so I do not have to rake it any longer.

Time for a bath and then to bed so good night and God bless. Oh yeah—some people have said they have tried to send internet cards and we are not opening them-- but for some reason we are not getting them. Sorry about that friends.

Love to all SSK

2008-11-11T08:24:00.001-05:00

Hi friends,

I want to start this update by thanking you for your wonderful kind emails that you send to us. I know that this drama has gone on far too long and the fact that you are still supporting us is more than amazing. Some people have said that I should write a book but at this point of the story it would be quite boring so it is nice that you are still willing to read my little updates and continue to care for us and about us. I guess it only makes sense that our story would be boring because our life is realtively very boring these days and weeks and months. The one nice part about not doing anything fun or exiciting or even normal for so long is that when we start to be able to do little things again (( like going our for breakfast,)) it will seem really speical to us. I am getting really anxious to go to the states for a day, because that is one thing we used to do on a regular basis. I like to shop over there and of course we always love going to see our daughter Syndie and her family. At Christmas time we always took a few trips across the boarder BUT there is always next year. :)

We were really late getting our pool opened this year--the middle of July I believe. So maybe that is why our pool closer is leaving us until the very bitter end to close the pool. He keeps telling us that he will come soon and get it winterized. I talked to him this week and told him that if he did not come soon I was going to have to rake the water to get the tons of leaves out of the pool or soon we would be able to skate on it. :( He said he will be here next week.

Today Suzie came and took Gary on his big outing to the hospital for both of his wounds to be assessed and then to have his blood work taken. That took them about two hours so Gary was pretty tired when they got home. I never came home at lunch time because she was here to take care of him for me. She went to the Dr. and got some prescriptions refilled for us and then she made supper so that was a big plus for me as well. I told her that she was welcome to move back home any time that she wanted to. :) I loved having a live-in maid. Syndie is coming on Friday for the day so that will be good for me as well.

The doctor today said he was pleased with the way Gary's bottom looked and that it is healing nicely. It is still a mega size wound and the depth is now down to the length of the nurses pinky finger. So it still has a very long way to go but the VAC unit greatly increases the healing speed.

Today Brian came over and put up the outdoor Christmas lights and then he set up the Christmas tree in the house. I think that we might leave the decorating of the tree until Friday when Syndie and her kids are here and they can decorate it for us this year.

Every thing has been different this year so I guess it is not surprising that a lot of our normal Christmas traditions will be put aside this year. It just means that next year things will be that much more exciting and special.

So that is it for today friends. Again - thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your love-prayers-kind words-empathy and support.

2008-11-10T04:15:00.001-05:00

Another sleepless night for my dear husband took place last night. He was awake all night again and so today was a very quiet day for both of us. He got a bit of sleep this morning and then the rest of the day we watched movies. I bundled him up this afternoon and took him outside for a short five minute walk. Today he has had an upset stomach for some reason and so that did not help at all. Suzie is coming tomorrow and will take Gary to the hospital to see the surgeon and the wound nurse. I hope we get a good report. The wound is still huge and we can only thank the Lord for the fact that Gary is experiencing very little pain unless he is sitting directly on the wound. Obviously, he cannot sit for more than about five minutes without becoming very uncomfortable. I tried to take him for a little van ride the last day that we had this week that was sunny. He had to try and sit on one side of his bottom in a semi lying down position so we did not go very far. He has to move from hip to hip in his bed and so to keep from facing the wall a lot he flips his pillows from one end of the bed to the other frequently. Last night he was awake because the muscles in his legs kept jerking. Today I have felt sad for him again because there is just so little that he can do besides lay on the bed. It gets very tiring for him watching TV and movies all of the time.

We keep talking about next year and how good that is going to be for us and how we will get to take a little vacation as soon as he gets feeling well enough. We had both set Thanksgiving as the date of being back to some semblance of normalcy and since that did not take place (and I do not think that we are even going to be able to set the American Thanksgiving as the goal. ) The nurse said that maybe Christmas will be the time that we can look forward to having all of this stuff behind us (no pun intended again) but I am really leary about setting any real goal time and we will just keep plugging along every day and hope that we can see some improvement each day. We seem to have too many days that do not have any signs of improvement. Gary's chest wound is smaller than at toonie now so that is awesome. This past week the nurse started using a product with "honey" in it for his chest wound. I guess it is something brand new as a treatment these days and yet I guess it is very old fashioned because they used to use honey in the olden days to treat wounds. Well--what goes around--comes around they say.

I have had the opportunity to work a few hours of overtime to help get the files all back into good condition after the merging of our new computer program so I have worked a little extra so that when Gary gets feeling better I can have a day or two off from work so that we can go and so something with a little bit of fun attached.

I will head to bed now sine I just got Gary all tucked into his bed.

Love

ssk

2008-11-08T05:56:00.000-05:00

Gary did not sleep one bit last night AGAIN. I guess his VAC unit was very noisy and that gets on his nerves a lot and I do not know why he did not sleep because he never slept during the day and he took two sleeping pills. He told me today he is just so sick o not feeling well. Can we blame him???

The weather has been absolutely wonderful for a couple of days and that sure made life a whole lot better.

I love the sunshine. But today we are back to that cold nasty rain. However it is November and we should not complain.

The nurse said that Gary’s wound is looking better every time she changes the dressing. He sees the surgeon on Monday. Suzie is coming to take him to the hospital for me.

I am tired again so more tomorrow.

Good night.

ssk

2008-11-06T04:29:00.000-05:00

Hi there,

Gary did not sleep last night again so we are switching the time of day that he takes some of his medication and we will see if that works any better. The poor guy feels so horrid all day when he does not sleep. And I think it is contagious because even though I slept—I feel exhausted tonight so I am heading to bed early.

I had some things I really wanted to get done tonight but I guess it will wait.

Gary’s dressing change went well and the nurses are still using positive words to describe how it looks.

So until tomorrow—Good night and God bless.

Sherrill

2008-11-05T04:05:00.001-05:00

What a beautiful day it was today for Nov. 4th. I hurried home at lunch but stopped for a couple of minutes on the way and picked up a chicken sandwich at Burger King for Gary and when I got home I took him outside to a lawn chair and that is where he ate his lunch. It was a super experience. The nurse had brought him a leg bag for his catheter so he felt a little less confined than when he had to carry two different containers.

He has had a quiet day but nothing negative at all so that is great. After lunch I took him for a short walk. It was really rather funny because he had on a tee shirt and boxer shorts and his leg bag wrapped to his calf and then he has the big VAC tube that comes from behind and hooked to a carrying case that goes over a shoulder. We just walked down the driveway to the front of our house but as we did about 25 kids from school were walking past with their teacher. After they passed I said to him—“Honey—there was a day when I think you might not have paraded around in front of a bunch of teenagers in your boxer shorts and a catheter bag” and he said---“I really do not care today about them. I just want to enjoy the beautiful sunshine!!!! ;-) Yeah Gary!!!!!!

Tomorrow he wants an instant replay of today he said –only this time he wants a burg .. To be continued

2008-11-04T04:25:00.000-05:00

Hi friends,

To-nights note will be short and sweet. Not much to tell you at all. Today when I got up and was getting ready to go to work,Gary was still awake from when he went to bed last night. He never got one speck of sleep last night because he had decided that he did not think that the sleeping pills were working very well so he never took any pills last night. I made him his breakfast and then got him back to bed by 8.30 am. He then slept until 11.30 am. The one nurse came to change his PICC line dressing today at noon. They had not taken time to remove any of the hair from his arm before they securely taped this last dressing on his arm so it was rather painful coming off. L The home maker came and then another nurse came an hour later to change his bottom dressing. He has been quiet all day but has not had any more sleep so hopefully he will sleep tonight. His brother left today for Jamaica and would it ever be nice to be making plans to do something like that. Our turn will come. :)

I worked some overtime today and told Gary that I will save up the hours for when he is feeling better we will do something together. :)

I am going to watch a movie with my honey now so ---- more tomorrow.

blessings

Sherrill

2008-11-03T04:15:00.000-05:00

I hope you all enjoyed your extra hour of sleep last night. I actually woke up very early but stayed in bed until after nine--just because I could. I remember very well how hard it was with little kids when we changed the time and they had a bit of an adjustment to get used to it. I woke Gary up at 10 am for breakfast. He said he had still been awake at three-thirty this morning. He went back to sleep after breakfast and then at about 1.30 pm I was going to give him some lunch but he said he was really not feeling that well. I went to the store for a few things and when I got back he had been sick. The poor guy just cannot win these days. His bladder has totally settled down now and so he wants to get the catheter removed but I am not sure what the Doctor will say about that. He told me today that he is already concerned about the “after effects” of having the catheter in and having to go through all of that drama again after it is removed, so he wants it out ASAP.

I had shared on this blog (which is like my personal every day diary that is open for the world to read) that I sometimes feel discouraged and feel down but that is just temporary little thoughts that enter my head. It was just yesterday that I was joking about being like Pollyanna and tying to find the good in everything. There are lots of good things as I shared on Friday. I know that God is still in control and that In His Time he will make all things perfect and right. My dad used to sing the old song—But Until Then—My heart will go on singing. Until then—with joy I’ll carry. Until the day that God chooses to heal Gary, we will just keep going on—One day at a time. Sometimes I do not sound like I am filled with joy and that is true. I was talking to my friend Megan tonight and we were sharing about how we are human and we do handle things as humans and God knows our thoughts and feelings -- even if they are never put on paper or into words. God knows our hearts!! And better yet—He understands!!! We all know people who are in much worse circumstances than we are going through and some of those dear folks do not have a light at the end of their tunnel. We at least are going to continue to head in the right direction -–again!! It has just been such a long drawn out event and while the rest of the world continues to go on with their lives ours appears to have come to a sudden halt. It will be so nice to be able to go for walks and hold hands instead of carrying “bags” J and pushing a walker. It will be so nice to go for drives again when Gary can sit instead of having to lie down in the back seat of the van, and it will be so nice to go back to church with our friends and it will be so nice to be able to eat in restaurants again (yes) and it will be so nice when Gary can start to sleep back in our room again and it will be so nice when we can go away on a little vacation. When we look back at all of the things we are missing doing together now, it just shows what a great life we had together before all of this trauma/drama started. So, when things are all back to “”” a semblance of normalcy”””” you will not have to read my “journal” any longer about all of our exciting events---like when we go our for breakfast how we will turn it into a major celebration. J J We again are thankful that we had the little reprise in September when things were so good for a wee while. That was a blessing. Our summer vacation was NIL and our fall get-away was canceled and I think we will hold off booking any winter vacation until later. I still say—2009 will be an awesome year and we will be able to look back and say------hmmmmmmmmm—I wonder what we will say??????????????

Love to all

ssk

1st Day of November

2008-11-02T08:12:00.001-05:00

Hi friends,

Gary has had a very very quiet down day. He said he feels like he has been beat up or dragged by a truck. I took him outside into the sunshine for a few minutes but he cannot walk far and he cannot sit so he was not out too long.

He does not like having tubes coming from the front and the back and so he stays pretty still on his hospital bed.

He slept a good amount today and I figure that helps the time go past plus should help him to heal.

I got discouraged today just because of the wonderful weather and I was thinking how nice it would be to be being something or going somewhere besides hanging around here but then I remembered back to when I was in London and all I wanted to do was to get home to my own little house. So, I BBQ’d a nice pork chop and potato supper and did some yard work and made the best of it. Gary has very little appetite but he attempted to eat some—to humor me maybe.

It is easy to look at other people and wish that we were like them but for now we re where we are and we must deal with that. I am off to bed and will write tomorrow.

Sherrill

Blessings to you all on this first day of November.

:-( a bad friday

2008-10-31T21:20:00.001-04:00

We had a BAD Friday. My poor dear husband put in another restless night and I never saw him before I went to work. When I got home at noon, Brian had been here and got his breakfast all ready for him but he was in much distress because he could not go to the bathroom. He said he had been there five times to try to pee—but no luck at all. So, the nurse arrived just as I was leaving for work this afternoon and we both decided he needed help right away so I called the Dr. and they said to get him to Emergency ASAP and so poor Brian got called on again. Three hours later they sent us home with the diagnosis of a raging bladder infection and so now Gary has a catheter back in his bladder and is on more antibiotics. I imagine that when they sent him home from the hospital and discontinued all of his antibiotics that no one though about doing another urine sample to see if the infection that he had for a few days had cleared up. DUH!!!! So, obviously, it was not completely cleared up and now it has come back full force. Just what he did not need was more distress and pain and another trip that place. We had the same scenario that we had this week on Tuesday when he was in out-patients and then went to the lab and they did not know how to take blood from his PICC line. Well, today the lab technician that came to take His blood did not know how to take it from the PICC line either so she had to take it the regular way. What is with that??? It is so much easier to take from a line that is already inserted into someone’s body wouldn’t you think.

I just went to the store to get his drugs and now it is time to get him some supper since it is past 7.30 pm. I left all of the lights off and so we have not had any trick or treaters. There is always next year.

I started getting really “”DOWN”” at the hospital this afternoon because the weather was so nice when I left work and here we were again—sitting in a dumb building with poor Gary lying on an uncomfortable stretcher for hours. I wanted to cry but decided there was little point of doing that. I tried to think of things to be thankful for and I decided I was thankful that I have a great job and that we have good benefits to pay for all of this medication that Gary swallows. I am also glad that I was not in a car accident two different times this week when one guy pulled right out in front up me making a turn that he should not have been making and another guy nearly rear-ended me when I hit my brakes because some other guy in front of me hit his brakes. So---some things are good.

Please pray that we can have a better weekend. Gary had morphine today for the dressing change so it has helped settle down the distress of his bladder.

and the pain that he was experiencing because of that. We will have to be careful to try not to trip over an extra tube now. “OUCH”.

Love

Sherrill

2008-10-31T08:21:00.000-04:00

Hi friends,

During the night I tried to remember if I updated the blog or if it was the day before. I guess even though I think I am OK—my brain is as tired as my body these days again.

Gary took his new medication at bedtime and it worked for a couple of hours. He was up by 2 am and I am not sure how much sleep he got after that. He is asleep right now. (7.30 am)

If the weather is as nice today as they say that it is going to be, then I will try to get him outside for a little walk. He is trying so hard not to be DOWN but it is just not his fault. He told me yesterday that this latest episode will likely ruin Christmas and I just laughed at him and told him NO WAY!!!!. I told one of my friends that he said that and she said –Hey—wasn’t it one of the London Doctors last May that said to him-Gary, will try and get you better by Christmas!!!!!! I remember how upset I was at the time and how I cried and cried. Now---we are entering into November and Christmas is right around the corner. He will be better by Christmas. PLEASE LORD!!!!!! 2009 will be a wonderful year. 2009 will be a wonderful year. 2009 will be a wonderful year. 2009 will be a wonderful year. Maybe if I keep saying it over and over it will be true. So the weekend is upon us again and that is good. I love to be able to be here during the day with Gary so he is not so lonely (when he is awake that is!!)

Jim will likely not get this posted until later today and that is my fault for not remembering to write it.

Blessings friend. Enjoy every single little activity that you can do together with your family, or with your husband--- even if it is just getting groceries or going for a drive or for a walk. Every single little thing will look good to Gary and I again-----very very soon.

Love

Sherrill

2008-10-30T08:13:00.000-04:00

I am just heading for bed. Gary had a very SLEEP day. The Dr. started him on a new medication yesterday and he took the first pill this morning and he has slept most of the day.

Hopefully he will be able to sleep tonight.

His chest wound looks great and continues to get smaller. His VAC dressing gives us lots of challenges because it is a very difficult area for us to keep the seal of the tape that holds the sponges in place and if the seal is not perfect then the machine makes a horrible noisy sound that drives us all bonkers.

Well—guess what? I thought I sent this to Jim and here I never even finished it last night and now I am heading to work instead of to bed.

Gary did not get to sleep until after 4 am so I guess it is no wonder with him sleeping all day yesterday. We will get this all sorted out as well.

Love you all

Sherrill

2008-10-28T22:07:00.000-04:00

Syndie arrived this morning and I called home from work to tell Gary that the wound specialist wanted him to come and see Dr. Mahoney just to check his wound. I had let him his morphine medication to take prior to leaving for the hospital. I was pleasantly surprised when the Dr. and the nurse both complimented Gary on how great the wound looked and how the healing was coming along so well. After the way it looked yesterday I was pretty scared as to what they might decide to do but by this morning the wound was very beefy red again. So all we can do is say—thank you Lord. I wish that God would supernaturally heal this huge wound. Syndie reminded me today of how needless this whole experience has been and how it was all due to lack of good nursing care in the London Intensive Care Unit,. I had worked so diligently to keep that area in-tact when he was in bed so much and then I did not have the opportunity when he was on the vent in ICU and this is the results from that long week in May. It really could make a person get discouraged that he has had to go through so much with a wound that should have been prevented. But Gary has been a trouper and never complains.

The morphine today really made hi loopy and normally he is able to be in bed after he takes it but today we were trying to get him to walk down the hospital corridor to go and get his blood work taken. The girls in the lab Do not have training to take blood from a Picc line so once we got into a chair in the lab they told us that, so Syndie said to them “well who does have training?” and they said the girls back in “day care out patients” know how to draw blood from a picc. So to prevent them from trying a number of times to stab him without success of getting blood (that is what happens so many many times) we returned to the bed in out patients department that we had just left and a nurse took his blood from the picc line. When he got to Dr; Leigh’s this afternoon they were just getting the report on his blood work and his hemoglobin is very low and his protein levels are low. I imagine that his decreased appetite is partly responsible for that so we are going to try to get him to eat a little more meat and good protein foods. He had been very tired most of the day from two big outings. It sure was a blessing for me to have Syndie here to help with her dad today. I could not have worked and taken care of him and these two appointments today with out her. Thank you to her wonderful co-workers at Angela Hospice for allowing her to be a blessing to her momma and daddy today. I did not sleep well at all last night so I am going to head to bed early tonight.

Thanks for your prayers. They were answered.

Love Sherrill

2008-10-27T18:48:00.000-04:00

I just got home from work and today was an OK day for me. Typical Monday!!!!! Gary had two nurses here to change his VAC dressing and I am not sure what they found but they called the wound nurse at the hospital and she called me at the office and told me she wanted me to have Gary come to the hospital tomorrow to see the surgeon. I do not know whether there is more infection or what. Obviously I was not here when the nurses were here, so I am not sure what to think. I have not told Gary yet and I might wait until the morning to tell him. Syndie is coming for the day tomorrow so that will be a big help to me to get him to the hospital. I have also booked him an appointment to see Dr. Leigh at 4 pm tomorrow and we will see if he thinks he needs some medical intervention with this deep dark depression he has fallen into that they are calling post traumatic stress syndrome. The poor guys sure has been through tons of stress and his body is just reacting to it.

He is sleeping right now because he has to take morphine prior to the dressing change and the effects of that hang on for a while after and that is probably not a bad thing at all.

It would be very very easy to become discouraged tonight but I am going to refuse to do that right now.

Just keep us in your prayers for a little while longer.

Love Sherrill

sundays update

2008-10-26T21:21:00.001-04:00

Today has been a down day but tomorrow will be better. I hope Gary can get some sleep tonight. His VAC unit became extremely noisy again but I got out the magic tape and got it sealed again so I hope it stays until the nurse gets here tomorrow. It can get on your nerves in a fast hurry when it growls all of the time.

We had friends that came to day and brought lunch with them and it was a nice treat to have someone to eat with. Thanks John and Sue. Thanks Wendy for bringing delicious chicken stew and banana bread. Yummy!!!

Brian and BJ have been so good about bringing us a plate from their meals and that has been great. This week I am going to give Brian some meat out of our freezer and just let them prepare it for their family and they can make us a plate. Sounds like a good deal to me and they are willing to do the work. I might get used to this way of living.

I went out for a walk in the wind and it was lovely to stomp on the blowing leaves—until it started to rain. It got rather cold in a hurry out there.

We are going to head to bed early and watch a video. Well, Gary will watch it and I will likely be asleep in five minutes.

Good night friends.

Love Sherrill

Sherrill

2008-10-26T09:00:00.001-04:00

Today has been a quiet restful day for us. Gary did not sleep well at all last night and I am not sure if he had too much sleep during the day or what the problem was but he had a bad night. This morning he told me his hair has really been bothering him so I called his hair dresser that he has gone to “forever” and she said she would come here on her way home from work. So I got his hair washed and she came and cut his hair and trimmed his beard so he at least feels better about that. His brother Vaughn and his wife Sherry came by for a visit this afternoon as well so that was nice. The nurse came to do his chest dressing today and then we have tomorrow off as far as any professionals coming and then he gets his chest and his bottom dressings changed on Monday at 1 pm. That means morphine and then that means more sleeping during the day.
I wanted to take him for a little walk in the driveway today but it has just been a little too cold. He is cold already most of the time. He has lost weight and his blood us thin.
He chose to lay down to eat his lunch today again. I think he was just too tired after not sleeping last night.
I forgot to send this last night and so now it is Sunday morning. Lastnight was not good again and Gary was still awake at 4.30 am and I am not sure how long he was awake after that or when he finally went to sleep. He had not slept at all during the daytime so we will have to try to get this all sorted out soon. I gave him a sleeping pill at 10.30 pm and a second one at midnight but they did not help. Oh boy!!!
I think this progress will be slow but I am praying it will be steady. We have to go to se Dr. Mahoney and the wound specialist (at the same time) ten days after discharge but that falls on a Saturday and then we could go Monday but the Dr. only has clinics on Tuesday and Thursday so we will see him on Nov. 4th. I was just thinking that we started our down hill slide at Easter and we are trusting that by Christmas our lives will be ready to start climbing steadily upward and that the year 2008 can be looked back on as a very bad dream (more like a nightmare) and that 2009 will be filled with great opportunities for outreaching to others. So many people have poured blessings into our lives this year, and we look forward to being able to have the tables turned so that we can bless others. Please keep praying for physical and emotional health for us. Thank you for caring and sharing and loving us.

Gary and Sherrill

2008-10-24T21:55:00.001-04:00

Hi there,

Today was just another quiet day. The VHA nurse and our friend Ruth Ann came to change Gary’s dressing today and he tolerated it very well with his morphine medication. He has slept a lot again today but that is exactly what he needs. He is not much for talking at all these days. He is just VERY down and I talked with my supervisor at work today and she said that with the amount of things that Gary has been through and all of the drugs that have been pumped into him and the nine anesthetics and the death of his dad are all things that would cause him to be depressed and he has every reason to be DOWN. I guess

time will be the answer to all of these things.

I am tired and will try to catch up on some rest this weekend.

It is so hard for us to believe that the end of October is nearly here. The time just seems to fly past. I am sure glad that I have my honey here at home with me and that I do not have to be pacing hospital corridors and waiting or elevators tonight. J I choose to be thankful for that.

Love to all

Sherrill

2008-10-24T08:22:00.001-04:00

Gary slept really well Wed. night and he was still asleep when I left for work. Brian came over and got his breakfast delivered to his bedside. He really is unhappy about not being able to sit at all but that time will come again. He slept a lot during the day and the PSW was here for an hour and the nurse came as well for more than an hour. I came home at noon and got him his lunch ready. Today the nurse is coming to change his dressing. She told me yesterday when she was here that they had three nurses do the dressing in the hospital and one student nurse had to leave because she could not handle it. If you could see the photos maybe you would not handle it either. L Poor Gary.

He is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo down in the dumps still and he cries a lot and I think his body has just been through too much in such a short period o time. All of the drugs that are pumped into a person in a crisis is just overwhelming.

Yesterday the hospital called me at work to tell me they had neglected to send me one prescription that Gary needed and it was for blood thinners to being by injection once a day for thirty days. I questioned them why he needed that and they the Dr. had ordered it and they had Not given me the prescription and could I come and get it. I asked them what Dr. had ordered this Tinzaparin and she told Mr. Dr. Stone. Well folks---he is an orthopedic Surgeon and a distant cousin of Gary’s name Joan Kivell had received a hip replacement last week and the medication was really for her and not for Gary. Sure good I questioned it, because they had attached it to the wrong patient. The last thing Gary needs is someone else’s drugs.

I will be here all weekend with him and we will try to have some high points.

Thanks for your continued prayers.

Love

Sherrill

Home Sweet Home

2008-10-23T04:32:00.001-04:00

One more time!!!!!! Gary came home about 5.30 pm and he says that he cannot put into words what it is like to be back at home in his own little house. I got him tucked into his hospital bed in the family room and then I made him a nice supper and then went to the Superstore to get his prescriptions filled. We had some drama when we went to leave the hospital because I was parked in the parking lot and the nurse walked Gary to the door from second floor because he cannot sit in a wheelchair of course. I got to the van and I could not get the key to turn at all. I tried and tried and then I cried and cried. Here was my poor husband standing at the door of the hospital and I could not even go and get him. So—the nurse walked him to the van and I got the back seat laid down for him and covered him with a blanket. I had already called Brian and he arrived shortly thereafter and he tried a number of times to turn the wheel and to try to get the key to turn. I think maybe I had turned the van off without the van being in “park” and it just froze or something. Anyway—I told Brian I had made it emotionally through Gary having his ninth surgery and dealing with one nasty nurse and being alone again for three weeks but the van put me over the edge.

I must go and get him settled for the night so I will type more tomorrow. Love

Sherrill

Tuesdays news

2008-10-21T21:57:00.002-04:00

I think and hope and pray that we can bring Gary home tomorrow.

He is just so down in the dumps and I know that he will do better at home. Yes—it is going to be tough with me being at work but I can take care of him in the morning and be home at noon and then again by 4.45pm. On the weekends I took total care of him in the hospital except for his IV meds. I helped him bathe and changed his bed and took him for his walks and set up his meal trays so it won’t be that much different. Oh yeah—I guess I do have to make the meals before I can set up his meal tray –don’t I??? Last night when his supper tray came he could not even look at it so I drove over to Brian’s and picked him up a plate of their supper and he enjoyed that. I told Suzie I could not figure out why I am so tired but then I started to go over my last couple of days and my schedule has been a little hectic. I get up in the morning and go directly to the hospital and then leave the hospital by 8.15 am and then I go to work from 8.30 am till noon and then I head back to the hospital and then I leave there and go back to work at 12.45 pm and work until 4.30 pm and then go back to the hospital either until bedtime or until I have to leave and go and pick something up.

I guess that is why I feel tired. So if he comes home tomorrow then I will least not have as much running to do and I will be able to concentrate a little better on this place. Gary will go back to having nursing and personal support help from CCAC for a while.

I continue to ask you to pray for him and for me that I will stay healthy and strong to be able to care for him while I continue to work.

Some of the nurses in the hospital are simply awesome and then there is an occasional one that really does need to consider an alternate career. The nurse that care for their patients with patience are so much nicer and we have had a lot of wonderful care. Today he had a young one that needs to gain some maturity before she should be allowed to care for sick people.

I am going to bed now and I will hopefully write with the wonderful news that Gary is all settled in his little hospital bed in the family room tomorrow night. He is still very weak and tonight he had another low fever but we will trust it is not of any consequence.

Love

Sherrill

Mondays News

2008-10-20T21:38:00.001-04:00

Today was an OK day. I am very tired because of last night and I did not sleep that well and so I have been “down” today but I will pull myself back up. I was in tears a couple of times just because I am so sad for my husband and because of all he has had to go through.

He is so depressed and I know that will improve once he gets out of the hospital and gets home again. His temperature was back up a bit tonight and so I asked again for them to please do blood work tomorrow. The wound nurse and his VHA nurse both changed his VAC dressing today and apparently they said he is really healing at an amazing speed again. There are some nice nurses on the floor but they just do not get things done on time and three times today he had to wait for over a half an hour for someone to take his blood sugar before he could eat. I think I get more impatient that he does.

When he gets home we will not have to depend so much on the schedule of other people and we can do our own thing. I was too tired to type about this stuff last night but Suzie went with me to take the wheelchair back to Kathy Eldridge (the one that was Ruby A’s sisters) and so on the way there we passed a front porch sale at 110 Lacroix Street. For those of you who do not know—that is where my mom and dad lived. So on the way back to the hospital we stopped and went up on the porch and I had such wonderful/emotional memories of my dad sitting there on his garden swing reading his Bible. Oh my my!!!!!!! We walked around to the back yard where they had more stuff for sale and we were not even looking at the things for sale but just at the house and the gardens. To that I could say—What gardens??? They had taken out all of dad’s beautiful roses. When the lady came outside I told her that she had purchased my mom’s home and she said she always hoped Mrs. Pearson would not drop by and see that her roses were all gone and I told her that they were more special to my dad. Then right of the blue she said—would you like to go in and see the inside and I never hesitated one second but said—Yes please!!!!!!!!! They have done a lot of remodeling of the kitchen and the bathroom but the living room looked like the days when mom and dad lived there and the emotions hit Suzie and I both at the very same moment and we both tearful. So that was kinda neat thing to have happen. They are going to put the house up for sale in the Spring she said.

I am heading for bed and I will talk more tomorrow to you.

Love from us.

Sunday's News

2008-10-20T04:06:00.000-04:00

I was just sitting down at the computer at 9.30pm when the hospital called
and asked me if I could come back because they could not get Gary's VAC to
stop making a horrible sound and they could not find a different canister
and they wondered if I had one here from before and Gary was
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO upset. The growling of the machine for over an hour had
really gotten on his nerves and he was having a meltdown. I felt so sorry
for him. He told me was going to die of a heart attack from stress if he
did not get out of that place soon. I told the nursing staff that if the
machine started growling again that they were to unplug it and put the old
fashioned packing back on his wound until the morning when the wound
specialist would be back in the building. When I got back to the hospital
the front doors are locked so I had to go through Emerg and then I could not
get through the doors there because they are secured and a security guard
has to let you through. Well-guess what???? Both security guards were
outside having a smoke break together. GRRRRRR When I wanted to get
through those doors--- I wanted through then---not in 15 minutes.
So I got upstairs and we got things settled down and I suggested that the
nurse give Gary something to settle his nerves. So now I am heading to bed
again and I will write more tomorrow.
They will have the culture results back tomorrow and I have requested more
blood work to make sure we are OK before we make plans to come home.
Suzie came and spent the afternoon and evening with us so that was good.
Love
Sherrill

2008-10-18T21:52:00.000-04:00

I guess the following little story is how you can tell if you are really tired and if your mind is not in good condition. I had said goodnight to my husband a few minutes ago and I went and stood in front of the elevator pressing the unlock button on my car door opener trying to get the elevator door to open. When I was getting frustrated as to why it would not come to my floor and I realized what I was doing I actually laughed at myself. Oh boy!!!!! I guess I need a little more sleep.

Gary’s day was pretty uneventful. I took him for two short walks but he is just soooooooooooooooooooooo down in the dumps and is in tears a lot. Today he kept telling me how sorry he was that he was doing this to me again. I tried to assure him that none of this has been his fault and he knows that, but it does not help to cheer him up. He still sleeps a fair amount during the day and that is likely good. I asked the nurse tonight when I was leaving if he had anything order like “Ativan” and he did, so I asked the nurse to give him one just to help him to settle and relax a little not to be so stressed about the circumstances that we have found ourselves in again. Sometimes it is hard to give thanks for everything and to count it all joy and to remember that we believe that there is a purpose for everything and to be willing to accept it as God’s will. Sometimes it is hard to believe the verse in the Bible-- Rom 8:28 that has been our family’s favorite Bible verse forever. But—through it all we will still learn to trust that God is in control and he will see us through.

Just before I left the hospital the alarm on Gary’s VAC unit went off to announce that the canister was full and needed to be changed so we put the call light on and the nurse that came did not have any idea what to do with it so I gave her a little lesson on changing it. Funny Funny!!!!

So, tomorrow will just be another day and then Monday he will get the VAC dressing changed again. The cultures should be back by then as well and then we can start making plans to get him home where he can start to heal faster physically and emotionally. It is going to be different with me being at work again but I am sure we can do it.

Thanks Joanne and Mike for bring home made “Meals on Wheels” to the hospital at noon today. It is so nice for Gary to have homemade food and Joanne knows since she has experienced enough hospital food in the past months as well. The Dr. came in a few minutes after the food had arrived and he said---“What smells so good in this room???”” He knew it could not be hospital food.

Love to all.

Sherrill

2008-10-18T05:30:00.001-04:00

Hi friends,

I just got home from a long Friday. Work was busy and I went to the hospital four different times. I did take time to go out for supper with a couple of girl friends and it was a nice break from being in a hospital room. We are glad again that Gary is in a private room again because then he can sleep when he wants to and no one else is there to disturb him. He is still getting morphine prior to his dressing change. I guess the wound nurse and the doctor were both thrilled today with how his wound looks so that is encouraging. I think I am a little fearful of being excited about any good news because I feel like we have been down this road before and then all of a sudden we were headed in the wrong direction. They did cultures of Gary’s wound on his bottom as well as his chest today. They will be back in 48 hours and that will tell us whether he needs to remain on antibiotics or if he can be disconnected from the picc line. The surgeon has been quite nice to him the last twice that he has been in to see him.

I think he now realizes how sick he was and what an amazing recovery that he is making. The biggest issue that he is facing right now is that he cannot sit for even a few seconds. I guess if you could picture this huge wound right through his derriere it only makes sense that he would not be able to sit down. So he has to eat lying on his side and trying to eat soup is a little bit challenging but we have done it.

His spirits were a little better today and that was good. He wants to get out of the hospital as soon as possible and I know he will do better once he gets home. It is going to be a little harder for me to have him at home this time since I am working now. He is very weak again and will not be able to care for himself, so we will have to figure out what we will do about all of that when the time comes. I imagine they will let him come home next week but he will need lots of nursing care and the homemaker as well. Both the home care nurse and the homemaker that he has had the past few months have been to the hospital to visit him numerous times. They were both very worried about him last week when he was so sick and now they are anxious for him to come back to his house so that they can help to care for him. I called a friend of ours today to help me and thanks Boots for getting the convertible ready to Get wrapped up and ready to bed for the winter and for going to get gas in my van and for delivering dishes back to my friend and for doing banking for my brother Ed (from Ukraine). There does not seem to be enough hours in the day when I am at work and then at the hospital four times a day as well to get everything done that I need to do so I appreciated the willing helping hands. I am very tired tonight and I think that I am rambling so I will talk to you all tomorrow.

Thanks for your love.

Sherrill

Down Day

2008-10-17T04:18:00.001-04:00

Today probably has been the lowest day for Gary emotionally since we started this second round of events. He has a bladder infection and that is causing him a lot of problems and he has a yeast infection and he did not sleep hardly at all last night and he is just plain not feeling well.

When he is so down in the dumps it is hard for me to deal with because I feel SO sad for him. He did nothing to deserve any of this and it makes it hard to handle. The nurse he had last night did not have much going for her in the way of compassion or empathy and that was not good either. He has a really nice nurse tonight so that will be better. He had more home made food tonight---thanks Pat H (again J ) and that was good. I am sure that he will get better faster once he gets home again. I just feel sad bad for him.

I am tired and I have been at the hospital four times today between working.

He will get the VAC changed tomorrow and I know that will be another painful event.

Thanks for all of your love and support and emails.

Sherrill

2008-10-16T04:24:00.001-04:00

I just got home and wanted to update you quickly. The wound nurse successfully put the VAC on Gary’s wound today (at about 6.30 pm) and it was quite the little exercise of cutting and packing and making it fit in the area it needed to be without causing a problem for other parts of his body. Everyone seems to be pleased with the look of this huge wound again as far as it looking clean.

She is really hoping that this will be successful and so are we. They took his catheter out today so we hope that will be a success story too.

Gary still has a lot of pain and I imagine that will continue for some time. He is anxious to be back at home but I think that will be a few days in coming. The sooner he can get home the less chance he will have of picking up more infection.

More tomorrow.

Love

Sherrill

2008-10-15T05:12:00.000-04:00

Today has been an “”interesting”” or maybe “frustrating” day for me. I decided to get up at 6.45 so that I could get to the hospital early and help Gary with his breakfast and to make sure they gave him something proper to eat besides rice crispies. I was also going to help him with his bath. I was there by 7.15 and he was sound asleep. I woke him up to tell him I was there and he kinda responded and then he went back to sleep. I left at 8.15 and when I arrived back at 12.15 on my lunch break, he did not even remember that I had been there in the morning. So that was an exercise in futility. I am going to sleep in a little longer tomorrow. So then at noon I brought him delicious home made chicken noodle soup---thanks to my wonderful friend Pat H. for bringing it to our house. I went to put the container into the microwave and just at that second a nurse called my name and said---hi Sherrill and I hit the microwave door with the container and spilled all of our soup all over the floor and down the front of the bar fridge and all down my pants and into my shoes. It splashed out more than six feet from where I dropped it I am sure. It was a disaster and the nurse felt like it was her fault but that was not the case all. I had not seen this nurse for over three years and so while we were cleaning up she asked me how my sister Judy was doing. I had to tell her that Judy had died more than two years ago. We both used bath towels and cleaned up ((what was to be our lunch)) from the floor and wall. Sure glad that I did not have to do the laundry. I am also glad that I had only taken enough of the big pot of soup for lunch and I still had more at home. J Thankfully, another wonderful friend Sue C had brought Gary and I two bbq'd hamburgers and I had put them into the little fridge at the hospital, so that was lunch instead of soup. Gary had very little on his hospital tray so I went to put it back in the hall on the tray cart and as I did, I spilled a full glass of ice water that was on the tray below where I slid his tray. To type this out just does not do justice to the way it looked and the messes I made. I made it back to work on time though—with soupy shoes and pants. Brian came and stayed with Gary this afternoon for a while and Nicole (wound nurse) came to change his dressing. Two of the huge retaining sutures had let go and so his wound now appears much more like his chest looked when they first started to carve him open back in April. You can lay the football into this wound now. It is actually quite unbelievable. Brian said that she was really really pleased with the look of things. They are going to try to put a vac machine on his wound tomorrow and then it will be playing the waiting game until we can get a unit to take home. There are politics involved with how many units can be on the go in each community. I have no idea how he will manage with a vac on this bottom wound, but time will tell. After he had his supper tonight I took him for a short walk and he is pretty weak again and had to hold onto a wheelchair for support. He said this time after he got back to bed that he felt like he had run a double marathon. We will try for a few shorter walks during the day and maybe that will help to build up his strength. Today is election day and he is very sad that he is not able to go and vote for his candidate and he mentioned how faithful his dad always was to help with the voting poles and wanted everyone to vote. *** I will finish this later. J

OK—to end my wonderful day I came home from the hospital a little early and decided since the moon was so beautiful that I would walk to CKSS to vote. I did just that but arrived there without any ID so they would not allow me to vote. I walked back home and got the van and drove back there and voted. I probably wound not have done if it had not been so important to Gary that one of us vote. Gary just called me because his temperature is up to 38.2 and he is not happy about that. Please pray that this will soon all be behind us.

Mike and Mary came over today to help me catch up on inside and outside work and I appreciate it so much. Thanks guys.

I am off to bed again and will update you tomorrow.

Love

Sherrill

2008-10-13T21:43:00.001-04:00

Hi friends,

I am hoping that you had an enjoyable time with your family and friends over a delicious turkey dinner. We will have a good Thanksgiving next year. We will celebrate from Easter to Thanksgiving next year and look back on these long tough months and be amazed that we made it through. J Today was a long painful day for Gary. His dressing changes really really hurt him. But at least when they give him morphine through the IV he goes to sleep and that is the best thing for him. It just makes the day really long when he does not wake up to talk at all. Brian and BJ made us a nice turkey dinner plate and that was nice. Gary even ate a little bit better than normal so that was good. Gary has to eat lying down because he cannot sit at all.

This morning a new doctor came in and ordered a different pain medication for Gary than he has been taking and it was Tramacet and he had that in London and it made him so he could not even function and made him very dizzy and light headed. They had already given him two pills when they told me and so I told them that he could not tolerate that drug. So, when they updated the chart with his medication they made the mistake of canceling the drug he can take (Torridol) and ordered the one he cannot take-Tramacet so they came and gave it to him again before I realized what they had done. So they said they had made a mistake and they have fixed it now and canceled the correct one. L He also has developed a yeast infection from all of the antibiotics and they did a culture for that this afternoon. I pray that it does not travel through the catheter tube into his bladder like it did in London. It just seems that we are repeating all of the things that happened in London. (trip to the OR—a fall—medication mistakes –different doctors that do not know him. L ) We are glad that we have the continuity of Dr. Leigh. That is a high spot for Gary.

I am very tired tonight so I am going to head for bed now.

As I said when I started this note—next year we will have a good Thanksgiving too. I tried to remember a lot of things to be thankful for and there really is a very long list. Sometimes it hard to dwell on the positive things when things right in front of our face seem to be so negative right now. But - God has blessed us with a wonderful family and so many awesome supportive friends that are walking this rough road with us and we are blessed because if that.

Good night family and friends.

Sherrill

2008-10-13T14:38:00.001-04:00

2008-10-12T21:23:00.002-04:00

Friends and family-----I am discouraged.

I have had a bad day today dealing with the Deja vous of walking hospital halls while Gary is sleeping due to Morphine that was given for his horrible pain from this latest massive wound. It just does not seem fair to watch him lie there and regress when we had gone so far the other way so recently. I feel so helpless to know what to do for him. His temperature has been back up over 38 again –even with Tylenol every four hours. A “fill-in” surgeon came in to see Gary today and his eyes almost looked like they were going to hit the mattress when he uncovered his wound. The nurse had already removed the packing and he said---“I thought this was just a sacral abscess. Oh my—this is a huge wound and is going to take a long time to heal.” Then he said there was some dead tissue and he started to debried it again and it was so painful for Gary. The way he squeezed my hand reminded me of how he said I squeezed his hand when I was in labor. The whole thing seems like we are repeating what we have already been though with a huge wound on a different part of his body. And because this is his whole left side of his bottom, he cannot sit at all. At least with his chest wound it did not affect his sitting—that is until his bedsore developed and then we were into a problem but that had almost gone. He has still not been to the bathroom and that is a big concern. He still has his catheter so that makes it a little easier for him. He was not up at all today so that just means he will get weaker by tomorrow. He was just plain too sick. Please pray with me that he will feel better tomorrow and that we be thanking God on Thanksgiving day for an amazing turn around. I just went out for a walk and the moon is nearly full and I looked up into the heavens and asked God to please speak just a word and Gary would be healed. I know He might not choose to heal him instantly but I just want to have the faith to believe that the healing could start again. It simply breaks my heart to see him lying there suffering so much again when we thought these tough days were all behind us. The one Doctor came in to day and said that his sugar levels were perfect and that was a plus.

He has had very little to eat today. Suzie and Steve were here at noon and they brought us a delicious supper but he only had a very tiny amount. He just does not feel like eating. I am glad they brought food because on his tray tonight he got mashed potatoes and gravy and squash again. He is supposed to be on a high protein diet according to the slip of paper on his tray but he never had a speck of meat or protein of any kind except a little glass milk . Tomorrow Brian and BJ are going to cook a turkey and bring us our supper so I hope he feels like eating a little bit then.

If you are ever trying to get in touch with us please feel free to call me on the cell phone 519-784-0200 and I give you another number to call back if necessary.

Thanks for praying for us when we are feeling too down to pray.

Love

Sherrill

update on Gary

2008-10-12T09:54:00.001-04:00

Hi friends,

I do not have any connection to the internet in the Chatham hospital but I can write stuff and take it home and then do it at home.

Gary had a really bad night. They had taken his catheter out during the afternoon and he had been unable to go to the bathroom right up to the time when I left last night. So about 3 am he got up and tried to sit in the bathroom to try and go and his major dressings fell into the toilet. Being Gary , he did not want to call the nurse so he tried to get it organized and got back to bed on his own and the nurse did not get in to help him for over a half an hour. Then they had to re-insert the catheter and the family Dr. said this morning that is was the least of his problems right now and they will leave it in for a few days. The surgeon was adamant that they remove it but now they think that the prostate might have been disturbed during the surgery and that it might be swollen and will need time to settle down.
His sugar was really elevated yesterday but that was partly due to a missed dose of insulin so hopefully that will all start to settle down again. His temp was 38.1 again this morning and no one is quite sure why but he will remain on the antibiotics plus the Tylenol extra strength to keep his temperature down. Obviously--the Tylenol just masks the temperature but it makes him feel better not to have the fever. The nurses here on the surgery floor are very nice and there has already been more continuity than we had in London so that will make a difference to his care. He also has the wound nurse involved who has been with him since July. She called me on the cell phone yesterday and asked me if I wanted to come to see the dressing change because she wanted to be with me.
Poor Gary has a major slice in his bottom that goes from the base of where his bedsore was on his tailbone right through his entire butt cheek down the to the top of his leg. I guess the one nurse who helped change the dressing the first day did not handle seeing this huge wound very well and nearly ended on the floor. I am so sad for Gary and I hated to see this huge incision but I think I am getting used to seeing the inside of his body through big incisions. The surgeon used three huge sutures to bring the gaping wound together but left it wide enough so that it could be packed twice a day.

The wound nurse wants to have a VAC put back on this area as soon as possible because it should heal three times as fast they said. I have asked a lot of questions as to how this much infection and tunneling could have taken place and no one was aware of it and how did it get so far ahead of everyone.
I just think it is sooooooooo sad that he had to go through all of this again when everyone has been so happy about the rate at which his wound has been healing. However--that is just the way that it happened and now we have to deal with it again and we will. He is having a lot of pain and he cannot sit on his bottom at all now with out distress. I asked his wound nurse what she thought about this huge setback and she got teary and said she is very, very sad. Gary does not deserve to go through this.

Thank you for your e-cards and for your regular cards and for your sympathy cards. I know that Gary has not dealt with the death of his dad yet and that will have to be put on hold until he is emotional strong again and can deal with it. The timing for this major set back could not have been worse as you know with his dad dying and me going back to work on Oct 1st.
Please keep praying and please know how much we appreciate your ongoing support. I told someone this week that I feel that the Kivell family have had more than their share of prayers and it is time for someone else to be in need and have the attention, :)

I am glad that I have this long weekend to be here all day with Gary because it is back to work on Tuesday. I work with amazing people and they have lots of good advice for me to help Gary through this so I am gradually getting the information all through to the nurses and doctors here so that Gary will be getting the best medication and the best high protein food etc.

Sometimes the people involved here are only looking at one area and Gary has become a very complex patient over the past number of months. He had never ever been sick so to go from healthy to where he has arrived now has been a horrid trip. Again I want to say how glad that I am to be in Chatham and able to be at work and to be sleeping in my own bed. I went home after Gary had his lunch today and he had a sleep (in fact he is still asleep) so that makes a difference for me. I got to put on a load of laundry and tidy up the house.

It was a week ago Wednesday that everything went into fast mode and my house still shows it. I have either been at work---at the funeral home---at the hospital---or asleep and there has not been much time for anything else. Yesterday I was going to take Gary for a little walk in a wheelchair but he wanted to walk so we took the elevator down to the emergency room exit and went outside by the river for a short walk. His legs were strong but he was very staggery (do you like that word?) I bet you can picture it though :) He said he felt like he had run a marathon when we got back to the room. When he wakes up we will go out side again today.

We are so thankful that God blessed us with a wonderful family Doctor-Dr. Leigh and we told him today that he cannot retire until we have been promoted to heaven. :)
Thanks for listening to me ramble and for being involved in our life.

Sherrill

PS: I just took Gary for a short walk outside and it was scary for me because he was so weak and unsteady on his feet. He said his legs were like rubber again and we started with him just holding my arm but I got a wheelchair and he tried to sit but that did not work for more than five seconds so he pushed it back to his room. We were only gone about ten minutes at the most and now he is back in bed having morphine by IV. He is having a lot of pain.
They just brought his supper and his high protein food consisted of mashed potatoes with gravy and mixed vegetables and tea. I asked the nurse about it and she could not believe it. She found a tray from someone who had gone home and got him a little piece of meatloaf. Oh boy!!!! He was too weak to feed himself again for supper and he hardly is eating anyway. Good we have access to Ensure. More tomorrow friends.

Love
ssk

2008-10-10T05:14:00.002-04:00

Another day has passed and things were relatively good all day. Gary actually asked for something to eat since he has just had ginger-ale and Jell-O for the past number of days. His temperature and blood pressure are excellent. The major dressing change took place with FOUR nurses plus the Doctor all involved this afternoon. I laughed right out loud tonight when one nurse told me that she thought maybe I should not see this huge wound because it might bother me. I guess they do not really know where we have been for the past number of months and the wounds that I have seen on this man’s body. How many wives have seen their husband’s heart beating and the entire inside of their chest cavity??? This nurse did say that the wound nurses were not quite prepared for the size and the depth of the area that the doctor had cut, but I guess it was necessary due to the infection tunneling so far into his body. I just pray that the treatment that they purpose now will fix him up properly this time. It seems a shame that his body had worked so hard to heal this wound and it was looking so amazing on the outside and yet the inside was harboring all of this infection. I guess it might explain all of the low grade fevers that have been present on and off since July. Gary was heavily sedated with IM injections of both Morphine and Torridol prior to the dressing change. They are going to do it twice a day for a few days I guess.

He was up to the bathroom to get shaved and cleaned up with the help of Brian this morning. I went to see him before work this morning and again at noon and again at 4.30 pm until 6 pm and then I actually came home for an hour or so to do some tidying up before I went back there for a couple of hours. I have not been in the house much since Wednesday night when Gary’s dad died and then we had the visitation and then Gary went to the hospital Friday night and then the funeral and it seems like I just fly into this place to go to bed and it needs a little love at this point. (before the board of health comes and closes us down. It has made such a difference to me already to have here in a Chatham hospital so that I can go to work and still get to see him a lot. I have a three day weekend now so that will be nice for us as well.

I am off to bed again. We are learning a new computer program at work so that has kept my mind a little occupied too.

Blessings friends.

Love

Sherrill

2008-10-09T20:32:00.002-04:00

Hard to believe that a week ago Saturday Gary actually drove the
convertible on #401 to Suzie's for our family party and now has been though
all of this trauma and drama. I am glad that we had a little reprieve for
some good times. I asked Jim to post this picture from last week with Papa
and his grandkids.

Encouraging...

2008-10-09T14:32:00.002-04:00

Hi All. This is Syndie writing. I must say that I really didn't expect to ever be updating this blog again. And yet... here I am.

Thank you for all your prayers. As you already read here the surgery was more in-depth than we anticipated but it certainly seems to have done the trick. Dad's temp has come back down to just a bit over normal and he is feeling SO much better. We realize now how close we came to losing him again.

He has had problems with his IV ever since he was admitted last Friday night. Last night it went "interstitial" (??) again. I believe that was time #5. This afternoon he was taken to have a PICC line put in again.

I'm sure that mom will post an update later with the latest news. The surgeon said the first 24-48 hours were critical time to see if he was making a turn around with the septicemia. It looks promising! We are hopeful... but guarded.

Thank you for your continued support.
Syndie

2008-10-09T04:14:00.002-04:00

One more time we thank God that we have made it through another surgery. This pacing of the halls waiting for the stretcher to come to the room to get Gary and then the pacing of the halls waiting for the Dr. to come out of the operating room with a report for the family and then the pacing of the halls waiting for him to come out of the recovery room is really still very tough on all of us. It does not get any easier and in some ways it is even tougher as each surgery poses more risks. Today was number 10 surgery and number 9 general anesthetic---- since March.

I just saw what Jim wrote an update for you on the blog earlier and I did not know that Chatham had the same service as University Hospital where an email card can be sent to a patient. I know how much every card meant to Gary when he was in London and so I was pleased to see that Jim found that site as well for Chatham and posted it for you in case you care to send a little encouraging message his way.

Today was tough for me because so many nurses were telling me how Gary was deteriorating before their eyes and that his temperature would not go down at all and how sick he was and I knew all of that but when they were telling me it made me really scared. So when Dr. Mahoney came out of the OR and called Suzie and Syndie I out of the waiting room across the hall to a private area I was ready to collapse. But he told us that Gary was OK and that was all I needed to hear. He said that he had had to be far more aggressive than he had planned and he had made a huge incision and that he had cut away a lot of tissue and that there was so much infection present. He said now the antibiotics should be able to start getting rid of the septicemia since dead tissue was blocking the area from getting treatment. He said that the next few days will tell him more, once he sees what happens then. Please keep praying that the outcome will be positive and that Gary will once again start to heal quickly.

During the surgery on his backside his chest dressing came off so the nurse on the surgery unit changed it tonight before I left for home. I took a picture of it and I will ask Jim to post it if it turned out OK.

I could not stay at work this afternoon even though I was supposed to be in intense training for our new computer program that is coming in less than two weeks. I could not concentrate and I knew the girls were with their dad but I needed to be there too.

If all is well in the morning I will be back at the office.

More tomorrow friends.

Love

Sherrill

Gary Kivell.. Grand Ave Campus.. Room #249

2008-10-08T18:26:00.002-04:00

I just got a call from Sherrill and Gary is out of surgery. The surgery took 1 1/2 hours. They made a large crescent moon shaped incision. They will be intensive packing on the wound for the next two days and they will know withing 2-10 days if the tissue will be able to heal. More information will be posted as it becomes available. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.s

Send Gary an E-Card

2008-10-08T14:12:00.005-04:00

Here is the necessary information to send Gary a e-card at Hospital

Gary Kivell
Grand Ave Campus
Room #249

Click on this link to go to hospital website

Details from hospital website

Send an Ecard
Sending an E-Card greeting will let your loved ones know you are thinking about them during their hospital stay. This free service is available for anyone currently an inpatient at Chatham-Kent Health Alliance.

Please complete the form below and your message will be printed on special stationery and delivered to your loved one's room by our hospital volunteers.

Messages will be delivered between the hours of 9 a.m. - 4 p.m. Monday to Friday only. We regret we cannot offer this service on weekends or statutory holidays at this time.

Our staff take great care to safeguard your privacy. If a patient is no longer in hospital, your message will be shredded and discarded without notification to you.

E-Cards that are submitted after 2:00 p.m., will be delivered the next business day.

update on Gary

2008-10-08T13:28:00.002-04:00

As of 1:30 pm on Wednesday Gary has not gone to surgery yet. The hospital has decided that Gary needs to be the last surgery in the OR for the day because of his MRSA. They hope to take him into surgery around 3:00. Gary continues to be very feverish and lethargic as he is waiting for surgery. Thank you for your continued prayers for Gary and his family.

A bad awful nasty horrible not nice day.

2008-10-08T04:10:00.000-04:00

That pretty much sums up what today was like for us. Man oh man!!!!!! I was just with my sister and she said that all she could do was to pray and I said to her—“”And what is the point of that Jackie??” Sometimes I get to that point and yet I do not really mean it. I sound like Syndie now, being that honest. I guess what happens when we feel we cannot pray anymore is that we depend on you to do the praying for us. I am so discouraged because Gary is so discouraged. Today I felt like he was about to give up and we need to keep him fighting to be able to win this horrid battle that we are fighting again. Last week he was doing so well and now look where we are!!!! His temp remains high and the antibiotics just do not seem to be kicking in the way that they need to and so at some point tomorrow he will be heading back to the operating for a general anesthetic to see if they can clean up some of this horrible infection that is not responding to the medication. The wound nurse said that more tunnels and caves are surfacing now that they are checking further into the wound and that they have to open the entire area up and it will likely end up with a VAC dressing on it. He has a huge area that is very red and hot and hard down near his coccyx as well. I asked the surgeon if he could just have local freezing and he said no because it was too big of a procedure. They will not do an epidural either.

I was at work during a training class this afternoon when I got a phone call that Gary’s temp had gone even higher and that they had just found him on the floor after a fall. Apparently he had tried to use the urinal and was too weak and fell. Brian had been with him right up to just before that happened. To top things off, we have to end up having the Doctor that treated Gary rudely on Sunday, because his other lady surgeon is not operating in the OR these days due to a recent childbirth. She is just working in out patients day surgery. So, even though I had asked to have that Doctor removed from Gary’s case we have to have him operate on Wednesday. The wound nurse came into the room and said that Gary was so ill and we had the choice of being transferred back to London ASAP or to let this Dr. come back and see him today and book the surgery. He was much nicer to Gary today so we will have to trust him. I have heard that he is a good surgeon and he had better be. The wound nurse said she would let him operate on her.

I have gone back to crying a lot today because I thought all of these bad days were behind us. To have started back to work last Wed and then to have to go through the funeral of Gary’s dad and then being in training at work and feeling like I needed to be at the hospital with Gary has made my emotions all go out of whack again.

So friends—when I say that I am having trouble praying please know that we are depending on you for your prayers for our needs. I know He will not fail us now, but it gets tougher and tougher the longer these trials go on. I appreciate you phone calls and emails to tell us that you are standing with us while we face this newest trauma. We will be so glad when the tables turn and we can be the ones that are praying for other sick folks and when our names are not connected with the needy ones.

The Dr. said that Gary will likely not go to the OR until sometime in the middle of the afternoon, because he is considered and “add on.”

The girls are both coming home tomorrow to be with us. They want me to go to my second day of training on our new computer system and I will see what I feel about that in the morning after I go up and see Gary.

More updates tomorrow. I will be happy when we can back to the once a week updates when I have nothing much to say.

Love

Sherrill

more surgery

2008-10-07T17:31:00.000-04:00

We just found out that Syndie's Dad Gary will ave to have a surgery tomorrow morning at 11:00am in Chatham.

He has been in the hospital since last Friday with Septicemia and a severe infection in a bed sore on his tail bone.

His body has not responded to the strong does of antibiotics and is still running a temp of almost 103. The surgeons hope to go in and remove pockets of infection in the wound and clean it out.

Because of Gary's diabetes there are a lot of risk factors plus the multiple surgeries this past spring for his heart and chest.

Your prayers for Gary and the family are much appreciated.

Jim L. Best